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Waiting for the Queen. 


{Page 1 3 1.) 





TOP O’ THE WORLD 

A Once upon a Time Tale 


By 

Mark E. Swan 
Pictures by Hy. Mayer 



New York 

E. P. Dutton & Company 

31 West Twenty-Third Street 


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Copyright 

E. P. DUTTON & COMPANY 
1908 

All Rights Reserved 



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THE TOP O’ THE WORLD was made 
into a story by permission of Mr. J. M. Allison 
from the fanciful extravaganza, THE TOP O’ 
THE WORLD. Book by Mark E. Swan, 
Lyrics by James O’Dea, Music by Anna Caldwell 
and Manuel Klein. 












TO MY LITTLE NIECE 

MARION 

WHO LOVES ICE-CREAM 


V 




FOREWORD 


Oh, little ones, with your pink cheeks 
and shining eyes, come clamber on my 
knee, put your arms about my neck, and 
listen with all your ears while I tell you a 
tale of 

ONCE UPON A TIME. 


vii 






Illustrations in Color 

PAGE 

Waiting for the Queen . Frontispiece^ 
She Could See Castles in the Coals . . 4 

When One is Sailing a Flying Machine . 24 

He Walked Deliberately into the Wall . 76 

In the Cake of Ice . . . . .114 

They Laughed and Laughed . . .190 


Illustrations in Black and White 


PAGB 

Aunt Mary Wore Fluffy Dresses . . 5 

Growly Voice Eats Snowballs . .11 

Aunt Mary Gets a Sealskin Coat . . 12 

Maida Crept out of Bed . . .16 

The Letter 20 

The Birds Came to the Rescue . . .28 

The Wolf Swallows a Tablet of Climate . 36 

Maida Meets Santa Claus . . -44 

Out Popped Jack-in-the-Box ... 49 

A Duel with Icicles . . . . • 71 

The Walrus Mends the Street . . 76 

“How Do You Do?" in Eskimo . . loi 

The Explorer Turns on the Tropical 

Climate 1 1 5 

Maida was Carted away in a Box . . 139 

Fido Flew 142 

The Queen Sees Her Face . . . .145 

The Gates of the Prison Flew Open . 161 

Maida .... ... 194 

X 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


Chapter I 



they have n’t She 


The Wishing Post 
grows right out of the 
ground at the Top of 
the World. Some 
very wise men with 
bald heads and long 
white beards say it 
is n’t a Wishing Post 
at all, and call it the 
North Pole, but Maida 
knows more about it 
than they do for she 
has been there and 
really and truly went 


2 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


there in a flying ship, and I can’t begin to 
tell you all that she saw and all that she did, 
but I will try and remember as much as I 
can. 

If you doubt my story ask Maida herself. 
She is a dear little girl, just nine, with 
curly brown hair and deep blue eyes, and 
she lives in a big house with papa and mama 
and Aunt Mary. If you want to find her 
go to Central Park and turn to the left. 
Maida’s house is the third from the corner. 
I don’t just remember the number, and 
I’ve forgotten the street, but as she nearly 
always wears a red dress and you know how 
she looks, you can easily find her. 

All the trouble began because Maida was 
such a little girl. She was just big enough 
to know how little she was, and she did n’t 
like being a little girl at all. She wanted 
to be grown up. She told me so herself. 
She had reasons, too, oh so many. To 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


3 


begin with, there was ice-cream. Maida 
loved ICE-CREAM. She could never get 
enough. (Perhaps you can never get 
enough, so you know just how she felt.) 
And she could eat and eat and eat, and 
ICE-CREAM never hurt her. On this point 
she differed with papa and mama. 

Once she awoke in the night with a most 
burning feeling right in her tummy, and had 
to drink all sorts of horrid medicine before 
she felt better. But she could not convince 
mama and papa it was the brown bread 
and baked beans she had eaten two days 
before. They insisted it was three plates of 
ice-cream for supper. Grown-ups are so 
silly sometimes. 

Then there was bedtime. Maida hated 
to go off to bed as soon as supper was over 
and leave everyone else up having a good 
time. Just at dusk when the flames in the 
fireplace began to dance and glitter and 


4 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 

flash — and she could see castles and trees 
and mountains in the coals — somebody 
with a white cap and apron would snatch 
her up and carry her off to a little pink and 
white room and plump her into a pink and 
white bed — when she was n’t a bit sleepy. 
Maida often meant to rebel at such treat- 
ment, but somehow when she cuddled up 
in the pink and white bed and finished 
yawning, she overlooked it, and the next 
thing — it would be morning. 

Still this ruffled her dignity every time it 
happened — as if she were sleepy, and did n’t 
know it, and she realized — -just as you do — 
that it was because she was a little girl ; for 
grown-ups can stay awake as long as they 
like. 

Then there were the clothes. Maida wore 
dresses which reached only to her knees, 
and plain little petticoats, while her shoes 
were so strong and tough — oh, you ’ll never 



“She could see castles 


in the coals ” 




4 






THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 5 


believe what tough shoes they were unless 
you wear the same kind. It was almost 
impossible to kick holes in them. Then her 



hair was done in a braid and she had to 
wear a pinafore — oh, I can’t tell you how 
badly Maida felt about her clothes — especi- 
ally when she looked at Aunt Mary. Aunt 


6 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


Mary wore fluffy dresses all hangy and 
traily, and the sweetest slippers with great 
high heels, and her hair was puffed out all 
over her head — oh, it was simply beautiful. 

And Aunt Mary read lovely books too, 
all about lords and ladies, while all of 
Maida’s books were about. Where is Peru ? 
and. How many is six times eight ? Poor 
Maida, she had so many troubles — but you 
understand, don’t you? So she wished 
and wished with all her heart that she were 
a really grown-up ; that she could read those 
lovely books and have her hair fuzzed all 
over her head — that she could wear those 
traily, hangy gowns, and stay up nights, and 
never, never, never have to eat anything 
but ICE-CREAM. 


Chapter II 

If you stand with one hand on the 
Wishing Post, and think hard of what you 
would like most in all the world, your wish 
comes true. Is n’t that lovely ? Sounds 
like a fairy tale, does n’t it ? But it is n’t 
a fairy tale at all, it ’s really true. Of course 
those old men with the goggles and the 
bald heads don’t believe it. If you ask 
them they will tell you the North Pole is 
just the end of the axis of the earth, what- 
ever that may mean, and they will insist it 
is n’t a Wishing Post at all. Now, when 
they tell you this, here ’s a crusher for them. 
Ask them how they know. Ask them if 
they ’ve ever been there to see. Just see 
what they say to that. Maida has been 
there, and she knows all about it. To 

7 


8 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


commence at the very beginning, this is how 
she came to make the trip. 

One evening, Maida was lying on the 
hearth kicking her fat legs in the air and 
watching the Flame Folk when she heard 
somebody (you know which one I mean — 
the one with the white cap and apron) com- 
ing. Now of course Maida was n’t the least 
bit sleepy and she did not want to go to 
bed, so she slipped out of the door and 
down the long hall to the very end. Then 
she heard somebody talking — oh, such a fine 
voice somebody had, just like the growl of 
a bear — but a nice soft growl, mind you — 
and what the man with the growly voice 
said must have been ever so funny, for Aunt 
Mary laughed and laughed. So Maida 
peeked. There sat Aunt Mary in one of 
the traily, fluffy dresses, and her pretty neck 
and arms looked so pink and soft, and her 
eyes were so bright and her cheeks were so 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 9 


red, that Maida envied her clear to the tips of 
her toes. The Man with the Growly Voice 
sat oh very close to Aunt Mary, and he was 
smiling a little and holding Aunt Mary’s 
hand (Aunt Mary did not seem to mind a 
bit), then Maida heard him say — “ Name 
the day.” 

So she went boldly in (because Aunt 
Mary knew it was some kind of a riddle or 
something and did n’t answer), and said to 
the Man with the Growly Voice, “How can 
anybody name days ? There are only seven 
and they’re already named — Monday, Tues- 
day, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Sat- 
urday, and Sunday. Then it begins all over 
again.” That must have been the answer to 
the joke, for Aunt Mary laughed, and the 
Man with the Growly Voice laughed, and 
the first thing Maida knew she was sitting 
on his knee, all comfy and happy. Well, 
the Man with the Growly Voice was an 


10 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


Arctic Explorer — if you know what that 
means. If you don’t, I’ll tell you. It’s 
a man who wants to go away up North so 
far that his next step will start him South ; 
and he had just come back from the land 
where it is always Winter. 

Somehow Maida found him the nicest 
grown-up she had ever met, he was so in- 
terested in everything she said, and some- 
how when she was cuddled against his big 
arm, with her nose nestled against his 
breast it was so easy to explain that she 
was tired — oh, so tired of being a little girl ; 
and tell him all her troubles. 

He listened to every word and then he 
told her about the Wishing Post He had 
really seen it many, many times — he had 
made ever so many wishes and all but one 
had come true and he had great hopes of 
that He must have told Aunt Mary about 
the wish for she seemed so interested. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


II 


Then the Man with the Growly Voice told 
Maida lots and lots of other things, — not 
stories mind you, true tales. He had been 
so long in the cold North that he could 



only sleep in the refrigerator, and he had 
to eat icicles and snowballs all the time be- 
cause he was used to them. Then he told 
her of the Eskimos ; funny little tame 
Indians who guard the North Pole, with 
great white bears, so no one can steal it. 


12 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


and when he dined with them they gave 
him nothing to eat but ice-cream. 

Think of it, all the little Eskimo children 
just eating ice-cream all day long. Maida 
decided she would be an Eskimo. Oh, the 



wonders he told her. How the seals swim 
in once a year with their cast-off skins and 
give them to the traders in return for char- 
lotte russe and sugar-plums, and this was 
something Maida was glad to find out, for 
she never could understand how Aunt 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 13 


Mary could get a sealskin coat without 
hurting the seal, so it was quite a relief to 
find the seals were glad to exchange them 
for charlotte russe and sugar-plums. But 
the most wonderful thing of all was the day 
the Man with the Growly Voice met Santa 
Claus, for he did really meet him face to 
face. It seems the Eskimos have Christ- 
mas on the Fourth of July, so Santa Claus 
drove about all day in his sledge with the 
six reindeer, giving away presents and 
taking the little Eskimo children for a ride. 
What a happy little girl Maida was that 
night, for somebody in a white cap and 
apron didn’t know where to find her, and 
there she was sitting up for once with the 
grown-ups and not a bit sleepy, not a bit. 

She grew so intent on the wonders told 
her by the Man with the Growly Voice that 
now and then she would miss something 
he said. Then Aunt Mary would laugh as 


14 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


if Maida were drowsy, which of course she 
wasn’t Of all his tales the Wishing Post 
was the best If she could only go there 
and wish herself grown up, oh, would n’t 
that be splendid. So she made him promise 
to take her on his next voyage. She was 
so happy when he said he would, she shut 
her eyes to think about it, besides the light 
was very bright and — well, to this day 
Maida does n’t remember what else the 
Man with the Growly Voice told her that 
night 


Chapter III 

And then she found herself — in bed — 
was n’t that a shame. She had been so 
happy sitting on the knee of the Man with 
the Growly Voice, so interested in his sto- 
ries, then that somebody (with the white cap 
and apron) had carried her off to bed. She 
couldn’t remember a thing about it, but of 
course that is the way it must have hap- 
pened. Oh, if she could only find the 
Wishing Post, things like this would not 
happen, she’d see to that. What a won- 
derful thing it must be, this Wishing Post, 
and how she would love to see it — and — 
what a strange light was coming in the win- 
dow. It was not morning, so it could not 
be sunlight, besides, sunlight is so bright. 

And it wasn’t a bit like moonlight, either. 

15 


i6 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


She grew very much interested, and sat up 



in bed to see. She was not at all afraid, for 
Maida was always a brave little girl, be- 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 17 


sides — comforting thought, if one did call 
out, why, somebody (with a white cap and 
apron) was just in the next room. What a 
strange light — all pale and green and shim- 
mering. My, isn’t that a long word ! but it 
means the kind of light you see in dreams, 
and it seemed to come from under the win- 
dow. Maida watched it as long as she 
could, but finally she crept out of bed, went 
to the window, and what do you think she 
saw outside — a really and truly flying ma- 
chine. It was a long bag of cloth like a 
great big cigar, and underneath it was the 
dearest little wicker house something like 
a boat. She could see strange engines 
through the windows, and there were wings 
at the sides, and at the back a rudder. 
There was a steering wheel behind the 
wicker house, and beside it stood the Man 
with the Growly Voice. He looked up, 
saw her, smiled, and waved his hand. 


i8 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


“I’ve come to take you to the Wishing 
Post,” he said. Maida started to climb out 
of the window, but she thought better of it 
when the Man with the Growly Voice spoke 
again. “Don’t you think,” he said, “that 
you had better dress before we start? It 
will be rather chilly at the North Pole, with 
nothing on but a pink and white nightie.” 
How her fingers flew ! She found all her 
clothes nicely piled on a chair beside her 
bed, and she dressed quicker than she ever 
dressed before, or since. Luckily her pretty 
white fur coat Aunt Mary had given her was 
hanging in the closet, and the cap beside it. 
She put them on, and as the coat reached to 
her feet she felt very warm and comfy. You 
will never know how quietly she opened the 
door. You will never know how “creepy” 
she stole down the stair. But just as she 
opened the big front door she happened to 
think of mama and papa and Aunt Mary. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 19 


She thought they might be worried, so she 
sat down to write them a note. Maida 
could write very well for such a little girl, 
although her T’s and her F’s would persist 
in looking alike, or worse still, when she 
meant to make a W an M would hop into 
its place. Well, this note was the best 
thing she had ever written. She had no 
idea she could write so rapidly. All the 
letters made themselves properly and some- 
how got into the right place. Altogether, 
it was a splendid letter. As nearly as I re- 
member, it ran something like this: 

“ Dear Mama, and Papa, and Aunt 
Mary: 

‘T was afraid you might be worried 
when you found me gone, and I was 
afraid to tell you because you might not 
let me go. I ’ll be back in a day or 
two. I ’ve only gone with a gentleman 
to find the North Pole and wish to be 
grown up. With dearest love, 

“Maida.” 


20 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


She knew that when they got her note 
they would n’t be worried at all. Then she 
went out and closed the big front door be- 
hind her. The Man with the Growly Voice 
was waiting and he lifted her into the little 



wicker house. “This is your room,” he 
said, showing her into a little cabin, 
and it was just lovely; all cuddly and 
comfy and bright. The little brass bed 
shone and shone; the pretty mirror re- 
flected her happy face. The lights danced 
and flickered — ah, in every way it was 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 21 


just exactly like what a room in a flying 
ship should be. 

Then she noticed they were going up — 
they passed the roof, then the chimney, then 
the church steeple next door. The house 
grew smaller and smaller until she couldn’t 
tell it from the houses beside it. They 
floated over the Park and Maida could see 
the lights of the city underneath her — and — 
then over the river with the boats going out 
and coming in. 

And she did n’t feel at all strange or in 
the least frightened. It all seemed perfectly 
natural and usual. A dreadful doubt as- 
sailed her. Suppose she were not awake. 
Suppose she was asleep and dreaming. 
“Excuse me,” she said timidly to the Man 
with the Growly Voice, “but will you please 
tell me your name?” “My name,” he 
growled in reply, “is Morse.” “Well then 
Mr. Morse,” she said, “tell me, please. 


22 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


honest to goodness cross your heart — am I 
awake?” And the Man with the Growly 
Voice crossed his heart and said, “Yes,” 
So that was settled, for of course he 
would n’t tell a story and say she was 
awake if she were asleep. Oh, what a 
happy little Maida, drifting — drifting far 
above the clouds, no more lessons or oat- 
meal porridge, or short frocks. Never 
again. Never would she have to go to bed 
at twilight. Traily, fluffy dresses and sit 
up nights and ice-cream — oh, lots and lots 
of ice-cream, for she was going to the 
Wishing Post and she would never come 
back till she had grown up. 


Chapter IV 

They flew and flew and flew. Maida 
could look out of her window and see the 
lights in houses far beneath. By and by the 
sky turned gray, little streaks of silver began 
to appear and the stars overhead grew pale. 
The streaks of silver turned to pink, to 
crimson, and then a huge red ball of fire 
seemed to shoot up out of the sea and hang 
in the East. “What is it?” asked Maida. 
She was quite surprised when the Man with 
the Growly Voice told her it was the sun. 
She had never seen the sun look like that — 
for never before had she been awake at 
sunrise. Over great lakes they sailed, and 
over forests of pines and ranges of high 
mountains, but there were no more cities 
and towns, only tents with Indians standing 

23 


24 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 

about them. And all the time the Man with 
the Growly Voice stood beside the wheel, 
steering the airship and looking straight 
ahead ; you know how careful papa has to 
be when he takes you out in his auto car ? 
Well — it ’s just like that when one is sailing 
a flying machine, only it ’s harder because 
an auto can only turn to the right or left, 
and if anything happens to the sparking 
plug or the jibboom, why papa can take 
the monkey-wrench and the hammer 
and the saw and the screw-driver and 
crawl under the auto to fix it. Then 
when he finds he ’s only made it worse 
he can get a horse to haul you home 
again. 

But a flying machine can turn to the 
right and to the left. Besides that, it can 
go up or down or sideways or turn over 
over and over, and my goodness, when any- 
thing happens to the sparking plug or the 


\ 



“When one is sailing a flying machine” 





THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 25 


jibboom of a flying machine you don’t have 
time to crawl under and fix it, for it falls 
and falls — and — oh, it’s “shuddery” to 
think of such a thing. 

Well — Maida knew the Man with the 
Growly Voice must be tired, and besides 
it was breakfast time, so she asked him 
to let her sit by the wheel and steer 
the flying machine a while : — then he 
could rest and get breakfast, and of course 
he did. She was a very proud little girl 
as she sat there guiding the airship through 
the air, and before long she began to play 
a bit. 

It was great sport to make a long dip 
downward and just miss the top of a moun- 
tain. It was quite a joke to glide along 
behind an eagle and take him by surprise 
and watch him flap his wings madly to get 
out of the way, as she hooted the horn, 
“hoot, hoot.” Did I tell you that all flying 


26 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


ships have horns, just like automobiles? 
Well they do, to warn the birds and frighten 
the shooting stars away. Oh, she was hav- 
ing a lovely time. 

Then the Man with the Growly Voice 
appeared in the door with a look of dis- 
may on his face. “I was in such a hurry 
to get away,” he said, “that I forgot to 
bring a single thing to eat. Is n’t that 
just like an Arctic Explorer? You see 
we ’re so anxious to explore we forget all 
about such things as food and clothes 
and fuel.” 

“Maybe we could borrow some ice-cream 
from one of the little Eskimo children,” 
faltered Maida timidly and she became so 
intent on thinking about the breakfast she 
could n’t have, that before she knew what 
she was doing she ran slap-bang into a 
comet. Of course the comet had no busi- 
ness there, and it was just as much surprised 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 27 


as Maida for it shouted and shouted, but 
before they could stop they were right in 
the midst of the tail. The man with the 
growly voice sprang to the bow. “Splice 
the bowsprit,” he roared. “Shiver the 
mainsail ” — “ lufT-luff.” “ Please sir, I 
don’t know how to luff-luff,” quavered 
Maida. Alas, it was no use. The comet 
switched its tail ; because it does tickle a 
comet when a flying ship gets tangled up 
in its tail — and one of the wings fell off the 
side of the ship. Then they began to go 
down, down, down. 

Did you ever fall out of bed in the night, 
when you were half asleep? Well it felt 
just like that, only a million times worse. 
Down, down, down. “ Oh, have n’t you 
got a life-preserver or something,” sobbed 
Maida. But the Man with the Growly Voice 
did n’t answer, he only stood and said 
things like — ^well, like Uncle George says 


28 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


when he tries to drive a nail and hits his 
thumb. Which was very naughty of him. 
Then just when Maida had given up in 
despair and was so frightened her heart had 



The Birds Came to the Rescue 


stopped beating — just when she was saying 
Now — for an awful bump,” a wonderful 
thing happened. Two of the very birds she 
had been teasing flew up, one seized the 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 29 


Man with the Growly Voice by the collar 
and the other seized Maida, then they flew 
gently with them down to the ground — and 
there was n’t any bump at all. Then they 
all sat and looked at each other. 


Chapter V 

“ Do you know,” said Maida, “I believe 
the birds are laughing at us?” 

Well, it really looked as though they were. 
Both of them sat staring first at Maida, then 
at the Explorer; now and then flapping their 
wings and making a sort of noise like — just 
like — did you ever slip on the ice and sit 
down hard when you weren’t expecting to 
do anything of the sort, and then did you 
hear someone across the street or in the 
next house giggle about it? Well, perhaps 
Maida only imagined it, but that is exactly 
the kind of noise those two birds were mak- 
ing. After a while they rose in the air, 
slowly flapping their big wings — flew about 
the wreck of the airship a few times, just to 
show how much better real wings are than 

30 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 31 


made wings, then they disappeared in the 
distance. Maida was getting cold. 

“As long as you ’re an Explorer,” she 
said, “don’t you think you had better ex- 
plore something? Where are we?” 

“Why, here,” said the man with the 
growly voice, “just here.” If we were n’t 
here, you know, we’d be somewhere else.” 

“Oh, I see,” replied Maida doubtfully, 
“and do you mind telling me where here'' 
is? Because I’ve an idea it isn’t anywhere.” 

“I suppose you ’ve studied geography,” 
said the man with the growly voice. “Oh, 
no,” Maida pouted, “I hate it.” “Too 
bad,” he answered. “If you had studied 
geography, you’d know exactly where we 
are.” “Haven’t you studied it?” asked 
Maida. “Let ’s change the subject,” was his 
reply. Maida began to shiver. 

The Explorer took from his pocket a 
small tablet wrapped in tissue paper, which 


32 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


looked very much like a piece of candy. He 
took the paper off and threw the tablet on 
the ground, just as you pop torpedoes on 
the Fourth of July. In an instant all the 
ice and snow began to melt Grass began 
to grow. Maida could feel it under her feet 
— pushing to come up, it was growing so 
fast Some little flowers suddenly peeped 
from the turf There was no fire, no smoke, 
but everything was warm and sweet, just 
like a Spring day. 

“My goodness ! What did you do?” said 
Maida, as she stopped shivering. “What 
was that?” she continued. “It would be 
lovely when the janitor doesn’t turn on the 
steam.” 

“That,” said the Explorer, “is a tablet of 
condensed climate. I gathered it in Mexico. 
Down there they have very warm weather, 
very warm indeed, so I simply condensed 
the heat into these little tablets; and that 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 33 


reminds me, I Ve a tin can full of it on the 
airship. I ’d better get it as I think we ’ll 
need it. The tablets are not very strong. 
One of them will only heat up a city for a 
year or so, but I Ve enough in the can 
to turn Greenland into Africa.” So he 
strapped the can of condensed climate on 
his back. 

At this moment they saw someone com- 
ing toward them through the high grass. 
As the stranger drew near Maida noticed 
that he was a very handsome young man 
with wonderful broad shoulders and long 
curly hair. He did not appear to see them 
but walked steadily on with his eyes fast- 
ened on the horizon, and would have 
passed them but Maida stopped him and 
asked him who he was and where he was 
going. 

“I am a disconsolate lover,” he replied, 
‘‘and I seek one in the far North.” 


34 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


“Tell me all about it,” said Mai da 
eagerly, for she loved romance. 

“You’ll laugh at me, I know,” he an- 
swered, “but I must tell someone, for my 
heart is full of it. One night I seemed to 
float away to a beautiful land all pure and 
white and in this strange place was a lady, 
tall and slender with cheeks like snow- 
drops and eyes like stars. Ah, she was so 
fair and white. She beckoned and I drew 
near. She smiled and I awoke, but I can 
not forget. Always in my dreams I see her 
smiling, beckoning. I have sought her 
through the North. I will never rest until 
I find her.” 

“Do you think,” inquired Maida anx- 
iously, “ that you will find her soon ? ” “ Oh 

yes,” he replied, “I am sure of it. I must 
find her soon,” and he strode away with his 
eyes fixed on the horizon. 

“I’ve a splendid idea,” said Maida, “if 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 35 

he ’s going to find the lady soon, let us fol- 
low him. Perhaps she ’ll be able to tell us 
where we can get breakfast” 

“Now that is really a splendid idea,” 
said the Man with the Growly Voice, “and 
we will.” So they did. But before long 
they began to find it cold again (the tablet 
of climate was such a little one). They 
began to find ice and snow in places. Bye 
and bye Maida heard something behind her 
and turned around, and there was a wolf. 
Oh, such an awful creature. What do you 
think Maida did? What would you do? 
Scream ? Well, that ’s what she did. 

“He’ll eat us!” she wailed. “Oh, have n’t 
you a gun or something to shoot him?” 

The man with the growly voice took 
another tablet of climate from his pocket and 
just as the wolf rushed at. them with wide 
open jaws, he tossed the tablet in its mouth. 
My, what a surprise for that wolf! He 


36 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


thought he was going to have a nice little 
girl for breakfast, and presto ! he had swal- 






The Wolf Swallows a Tablet of Climate 


lowed three or four days of awfully hot 
weather. He rolled and yelped and jumped 
about — well, if you want to know just 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 37 


exactly how he behaved, borrow a tablet 
of climate from the Explorer; go up there 
where Maida was, and give it to the first 
wolf that comes along. Then you ’ll see. 

Finally the wolf ran away as hard as he 
could. But the climate he had swallowed 
made everything warm as it passed. So 
they all three followed it along a nice grassy 
lane bordered with flowers, and warm as a 
Spring day. 


chapter VI 

Maid A began to think the disconsolate 
lover was mistaken about finding the 
“Lady” soon. There seemed to be no 
sign of her. And they walked and walked 
and walked. At last, in the distance, they 
saw a house. Not a great big fine house 
such as Maida lived in at home, but a low 
hut built of heavy logs with a slanting roof 
and a high chimney with lots of smoke 
coming out of it. The wolf passed by the 
house without stopping for it was in a hurry 
to go somewhere and get something cool 
to drink, but the disconsolate lover knocked 
loudly on the door. 

“I wonder if the lady lives here,” said 
Maida. The disconsolate lover knocked 


38 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 39 


again, and again, and finally the door 
swung open and they all walked in. They 
were in a toy shop. The house looked — 
oh, ever so much larger now that they were 
in, than it did from the outside. There 
were long rooms filled with toys and dollies. 
There were benches and shelves where toys 
were being made by funny little men. The 
walls and rafters were hung with all sorts 
of jumping-jacks and — oh, everything 
children like. 

The lad who opened the door stood look- 
ing at them. He was dressed all in leather 
and his hair hung over his neck. Maida 
was sure she had never seen such a nice 
friendly looking boy. “My name is Billy,” 
he said. “Whose little boy are you?” “If 
you please,” replied Maida, “I’m not a boy 
— I’m a little girl,” and she threw open her 
long fur cloak so he could see what a pretty 
dress she wore. At once all the little work- 


40 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


men stopped work and crowded about her, 
for strange as it may seem they had hardly 
ever seen a little girl. Maida was quite 
frightened and looked about for the Man 
with the Growly Voice — or the Disconsolate 
Lover, but as neither of them were in sight 
she ran to Billy for protection and cuddled in 
his arms. ‘ ‘ What ’s the matter with them ? ’ ’ 
she faltered. Billy laughed. “They’re 
curious to see you,” he replied, “because 
you ’re a little girl.” “Little girls must be 
scarce up here,” observed Maida (still nest- 
ling close to Billy). Billy laughed again. 
“Scarce,” he said, “why I should say they 
are /” So he sent the workmen back to their 
benches and gave Maida all the ice-cream 
she could eat for breakfast. It was good 
ice-cream too, still — -just for once she 
would n’t have minded if she could have 
had a cup of coffee and a slice of bacon. 
After breakfast Billy showed her all over 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 41 


the shop, and she was allowed to see the 
workmen making toys. When they re- 
turned to the great room who should they 
meet but a huge Eskimo and his pretty little 
daughter, both dressed entirely in furs. 

The Eskimo was very grand. “I am 
Kankakee,” he said, and waving his hand 
toward his daughter added, “this is Koko- 
mo, my daughter,” upon which Kokomo 
came to Maida and made a lovely curtsey 
saying something that sounded like — ^well I 
can hardly tell you just what it was like. 
Did you ever hear an angry old hen calling 
her chickens? Well it was something like 
that, and something like the rattle on the 
trolley car when the man lets off the 
brake — for poor little Kokomo could not 
speak English — only Eskimo. 

“So you’re an Eskimo,” said Maida, 
“can you tell me about the Wishing Post?” 

The big Eskimo drew himself up proudly. 


42 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


“I can tell you all about it,” he replied, ^Tor 
I am a great man, and very wise, also I 
know many things. The Wishing Post 
grows out of the earth at the Top of the 
World and if one makes a wish upon it the 
wish will come true.” 

Maida was overjoyed. “I am going to 
make a wish just as soon as I find it,” she 
told him. “You find it ! ” he said scornfully, 
“why it is death for mortal to try to cross 
the Forbidden Land, to reach the city of 
Illusia. Even / have never crossed those 
icy wastes, and should you find the Post 
you would be put to death by the Queen 
of the North, Aurora Borealis, or her Prime 
Minister, Jack Frost. Look ! ” and he pointed 
out of the window, “you can see the lights 
shining from her crown — ^when she is pleased 
the light is white ; when she is jealous it is 
green. When she is sad the light is blue, 
and when she is angry the light is red.” 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 43 


At this moment a huge stream of red light 
waved about and cast a red glow over all 
the room. 

“ My goodness ! ” said Maida, “she must 
be in a dreadful temper to-day!” But the 
Eskimo and his daughter only drew their 
fur robes about them and walked away. 
Maida would have followed them to find 
out some more but she ran plump into the 
roundest, jolliest, old man you ever saw. 
He wore a long green coat and big leather 
boots, and his long hair and beard were 
snow-white. Oh, he was so fat and so jolly ! 
His face was red and chubby and he had 
the nicest smile ; he reminded her of some 
one but she could n’t think just who it was. 
He was very much surprised to see Maida. 
“Well, well!” he shouted, “a little girl. 
Come sit on my knee, my dear, and tell me 
all about it.” 

So Maida sat on his knee and told him 



Maida Meets Santa Claus 


44 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 45 

all about it. “I’m going to the Wishing 
Post,” she said, “and wish to be grown 
up.” 

“Grown up?” replied the chubby old 
man. “Why childhood is the happiest 
time of life.” 

“That’s what the grown-ups tell us,” 
Maida answered, “but I guess they ’ve for- 
gotten all about it. I don’t suppose you 
were ever spanked and put to bed without 
your supper because you would n’t learn 
your lessons.” 

The chubby old man became very earnest 
and a little sad. “ If you grow up quickly,” 
he said, “you won’t care for dollies and 
candy any more. You can’t sit like this on 
my knee, and you ’ll always be puzzling your 
pretty little head because you ’ve nothing to 
wear.” 

Maida looked at him rather puzzled. 
“Your face looks so — so familiar to me,” 


/ 


46 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


she said, “I ’ve seen you somewhere but I 
can’t remember where it was.” 

Billy looked at Maida and smiled. “Why 
in your picture books, ’ ’ he laughed. ‘ ‘ Don’ t 
you know who this is ? Why Santa Claus, 
of course.” And it was. 


Chapter VII 

How would you like to meet Santa Claus 
face to face ? How would you like him to 
hold you on his knee and tell you all about 
everything ? How would you like him to 
show you all about, and let you see the 
wonderful sleigh and pet the reindeers? 
Well then, you can just imagine the fun 
Maida had. 

“Do you know,’’ she said to him shyly, 
“I am really very glad I met you. You 
see, Willie Porter, he’s ten, and he knows 
much more than I do, or thinks he does, — 
well, he told me there wasn’t any Santa 
Claus. He hung up his stocking last 
Christmas, then he stayed awake all night to 
see if Santa Claus filled it His papa and 

47 


48 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


mama came into his room ever so many 
times in the night, but you never came 
near.” 

“Ah! I can explain that,” laughed Santa. 
“Willie Porter’s papa used to have a fine 
big open chimney and a lovely fireplace. 
Then I used to go there every Christmas. 
But now they’ve shut up the fireplace, so I 
can’t get down the chimney, and they’ve 
put in steam heat. Does Willie Porter think 
I can bring my gifts and crawl through a 
radiator?” And Santa Claus laughed till he 
shook like a jelly. 

“Ah, I see,” said Maida. “Well, as I 
have seen all the toys and had a most splen- 
did time I s’pose I must be going, for I am 
in a hurry to get to the Wishing Post and 
grow up.” So she prepared to resume her 
journey but Santa Claus would n’t hear of it. 
“You haven’t seen all the toys,” he 
shouted. “The two best ones were just 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 49 


finished to-day. Come along with me 
and we’ll take a look at them.” 

So she went with him into a room she 
hadn’t seen before, but all she could see 
was two boxes. One was very tall and 
stood on end, the other was square, with 
green and yellow stripes on it. 



Maida began to peer about the square 
box with green and yellow stripes on it, 
when, all of a sudden, she touched a little 
button. The lid of the box flew open, and 
out popped the biggest Jack-in-the-Box she 


50 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


had ever seen. He must have been 
made of springs inside, for he leaned this 
way and that, and joggled up and down, 
till Maida thought he’d break in two. 
He was dressed in a long coat or shirt 
with pleats in it, just like the folding part 
of papa’s camera, and he looked very 
funny. “I feel just like a concertina,” he 
remarked. 

Maida ran to the other box, opened it, 
and out stepped a Candy Kid. He was much 
taller than Maida, his arms and legs were 
made of stick candy, his body was a large 
chocolate drop, and his head was a marsh- 
mallow. Before Maida realized what she 
was doing she picked off one of his fingers 
and ate it. The Candy Kid did n’t mind, but 
Santa Claus did n’t like it at all. He told 
her not to do anything of the sort again, and 
got some candy to make the Candy Kid 
another finger. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 51 


“Oh, you beautiful little dolly,” sighed 
Jack-in- the-Box looking at Maida. 

“ She is n’t a dolly,” said the Candy Kid. 
“ I believe Santa Claus made her out of a 
charlotte russe,” for of course the Candy Kid 
thought Santa Claus made everything out 
of some kind of sweetmeats. 

But Jack-in-the-Box was too full of his 
thoughts to let the Candy Kid stop him. 
He bobbed his poor little head, shook about 
in the box and said : “ Oh, I like you very 

much. I would kneel and tell you all 
about it, only I have no knees. I would 
clasp you in my arms, only I have no 
arms.” 

“I like you too,” said Maida shyly, and 
she nestled up against him. “You are very 
quaint. Oh, how your poor heart is beat- 
ing.” 

“That is n’t my heart,” replied Jack-in-the- 
Box, that’s my mainspring.” Suddenly a 


52 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


loud rattle came from somewhere near his 
chin. “There,” he sighed, “ a cog slipped.” 

The Candy Kid had been listening, and 
he did n’t seem to like Maida to notice 
Jack-in-the-Box so much, so he politely 
gave her his arm and walked away with 
her. Jack-in-the-Box lost his temper at this 
and threatened the Candy Kid with all sorts 
of dreadful things, when suddenly there was 
a rattle ; a jerk ; and Jack-in-the-Box leaned 
over limp and flat. “Oh, is he dead?” 
sobbed Maida. “No, only run down,” 
chuckled Santa Claus who then wound him 
up. “He always runs down,” said Santa, 
“just when he should n’t.” 

“Oh, I like him so much,” laughed 
Maida, “but I should think you’d find it 
awfully hard work to make them.” “Not 
a bit,” answered Santa Claus, “ I think of 
something to delight children, and presto — 
it is made.” 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 53 


Jack-in-the-Box set up a howling, till 
they had to stop their ears. “Think me 
some arms and legs,” he roared ; “think me 
some arms and legs.” 

“ I have,” answered Santa Claus ; and 
sure enough, there they were, two funny 
little arms swinging stiffly about, and as 
he hopped out of the box Maida saw he 
had two stiff little legs. Jack-in-the-Box 
tried to walk but it was very hard for 
him. 

“Don’t you see,” he inquired, “that I 
am very starchy. Think me some ball 
bearings in the joints.” So Santa Claus 
did, and then he was all right. Oh, they 
had a fine time, while Santa Claus left 
them all alone to go and pack an order of 
toys for some little children in Bombay. 
But just when the fun was at its height 
Maida heard a tremendous roar. She 
turned around to see what made such a 


54 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


noise, and her hair stood on end with 
fright, for there stood a great big white 
Polar Bear. The Candy Kid climbed into 
his box. Maida flew wildly about the 
room and finally shut herself in a cup- 
board, but poor Jack — -just as he was about 
to make his escape, he ran down. The 
bear slowly drew near Jack-in-the-Box 
and Maida’s heart flew up in her mouth 
for she was afraid it would eat him. But 
it did n’t. It wound him up. Then Jack- 
in-the-Box said “thank you,” and the 
Bear bowed politely. The Candy Kid 
saw that the Bear was n’t hungry, so he 
came out of his box and tickled the Bear 
behind the left ear, and the Bear liked 
it so well he began to hop about and 
dance. The Candy Kid began to dance, 
then Jack-in-the-Box began to dance, and 
they laughed and danced and jumped 
about till they reached the door, and danced 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 55 


out of it; and the last Maida saw of the 
Candy Kid and Jack-in- the-Box and the 
friendly Bear, they were dancing away, 
together. 


Chapter VIII 

Well, it does make one feel bad to have 
playmates run away like that, and Maida 
was heartbroken. She could see the three 
capering over the ice and snow far, far away, 
having, oh such a good time, and the Bear 
seemed so friendly and polite she had lost 
all fear of him. Just then she heard a tink- 
ling of bells and looked outside the window 
to see what caused it. There was a sledge 
drawn by some beautiful Eskimo dogs, 
moving along and going in the direc- 
tion taken by the friends. She gave no 
thought to Santa Claus, or the Disconsolate 
Lover, or the Man with the Growly Voice, 
or even Billy, but rushed out of the door and 
leaped on the sledge which was slowly 
56 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 57 


moving away. “ Hurry,” she gasped, 
“hurry, or they’ll get away.” 

To her joy she found the little Eskimo girl, 
Kokomo, was the only passenger, and Kan- 
kakee, her father, was driving the dogs. 
Kokomo turned and smiled at her, saying 
something that sounded very much like 
‘ ‘ muk-a-luk-a-chuk-a-grwokzbski. ’ ’ (That 
last word is a terrible thing, isn’t it? It’s 
very hard to spell, and I haven’t an idea 
how it sounds; — it must be a very hard word, 
but Kokomo said it, so I have to put it in.) 

Faster and faster they flew till they were 
going like the wind. Behind them were 
some more people, on sledges drawn by 
dogs, but Maida did n’t care who they were 
or where they were going. All she thought 
of was finding the Jack-in-th e-Box and the 
Candy Kid. “Suppose,” she moaned to 
Kokomo, “suppose he should get lost and 
should run down.” “ Blik-a-tik-a-zik-a- 


58 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


rikow-bik ski,” said Kokomo sadly. (Isn’t 
it awful, the way those Eskimos talk? And 
I don’t see how they ever learn to spell.) 

It seemed an age to Maida, and it must 
have been several hours before she saw her 
two friends. They were standing in the 
midst of a field of ice, and poor Jack-in- the- 
Box hung limp and dejected on a block of 
ice, while the Candy Kid seemed to be trying 
to help him. She could see nothing of the 
Bear. “Stop, stop 1” she called to Kanka- 
kee ; but either he did not hear or he was in 
too great a hurry, for he only snapped his 
long dog whip and howled “Mush I ” to the 
dogs. When an Eskimo says “Mush” to 
his dogs, he means what you mean when 
you say, “Get up!” to pony. Well, Maida 
could n’t bear to see her friends left alone, 
so she rolled off the sledge into a soft snow- 
bank, and it didn’t hurt her a bit. Then 
while she was picking herself up and dig- 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 59 


ging the snow out of her eyes, all the 
sledges rushed by her without stopping. 
She ran quickly to the Candy Kid. “Oh, 
dear, dear,” she sobbed, “what is the mat- 
ter with him ? ” “He’s run down,” replied 
the Candy Kid. “Well, why don’t you 
wind him up?” retorted Maida angrily, 
stamping her foot. “Can’t do it,” said the 
Candy Kid, “we’ve lost the key.” Then 
overcome by his feelings the Candy Kid sat 
down and began to cry at the top of his 
voice. Which was perfectly natural. A 
huge white mound, which Maida had mis- 
taken for a snow-bank, reared up beside the 
Candy Kid, and Maida stepped back in sur- 
prise. It was the Bear. Maida was very 
uneasy. He hadn’t eaten the Candy Kid. 
Well, perhaps he didn’t care for sweets, 
and of course he could n’t eat an overgrown 
alarm-clock like Jack-in-the-Box, but she 
had heard that bears like little girls as well 


6o THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


as little girls like chocolate creams, and she 
felt a strong desire to run. But the Bear 
didn’t attack her. No indeed, he wasn’t 
that kind of a Bear. He laid his head on 
the shoulder of the Candy Kid and lifted up 
his voice and wept, which was very nice of 
him. Maida was so overcome by his grief 
she ran to him and wiped his eyes with her 
handkerchief. Then they all had a good cry 
together. At last the Bear put his arm about 
Maida (I call it his arm, though it was really 
his foreleg), and patted her on the shoulder. 
So she felt better, and stopped crying. 

“By the way,” said Maida to the Candy 
Kid, “I’ve never been properly introduced 
to the Bear. Do you mind making us 
acquainted?” 

So the Candy Kid presented the Bear, 
who made a lovely bow, — really, for a Polar 
Bear who had never been in any sort of 
society, he was very, very polite. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 6i 


And then Maida found the key. Wasn’t 
that lovely? Ah, I tell you, it didn’t 
take her long to wind up Jack-in-the- 
Box, and how the four of them did laugh 
and cry and dance about, all through pure 
happiness. 

“This habit of mine is very distressing,” 
observed Jack-in-the-Box to Maida. “Did 
you ever start to talk or go somewhere and 
all of a sudden feel your mainspring give 
out and your wheels stop turning?” 

“No, I never did,” replied Maida, “but it 
must be — dreadful.” 

“And now, what are we going to do?” 
said the Candy Kid. 

“I’m afraid I’ll never find the Wishing 
Post,” sighed Maida. 

Then the Bear began to talk. If you think 
Eskimo talk is hard to understand, you 
should have heard the Bear. It sounded 
like the roaring of thunder and the rattle of 


62 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


chains, but little by little they understood 
him, for he waved his paws, and pointed to 
the North, and wagged his head; so finally 
they understood he would take them to the 
Wishing Post. Maida climbed on his back, 
which pleased him mightily. The other 
two followed them, and they set out again, 
the merriest little party you ever saw, on 
their way to the Top of the World. 


Chapter IX 

“Isn’t it ever going to be night?” in- 
quired Maida fretfully, as they paused for a 
rest on top of a huge hill of snow. 

“You forget,” replied the Candy Kid, 
“that up here the days are six months long. 
Why, it ’s only half-past June.” So they 
went on again. 

“Oh, I’m so cold and tired,” sighed 
Maida, rubbing her hands on the Bear’s 
furry coat to warm them. Jack-in-the- 
Box looked at her in surprise. “Cold?” 
he asked curiously. “What is cold?” 
“Oh, you would n’t know,” replied Maida, 
and of course he would n’t for he was only 
a clock-work man. But her answer did not 
seem to satisfy him, for he scratched his 

63 


64 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


head in a puzzled manner. “Tired, tired,” 
he repeated, “the word sounds familiar, but 
what does it mean ? ” Maida sighed again ; 
it was so difficult to make Jack understand. 
“Why it means,” she explained, “you feel 
so weary; you can hardly lift your arms, 
and your legs ache, and you don’t want to 
move.” “Oh, I know now,” interrupted 
Jack in great glee. “I often get that way. 
You’re run down. Where’s your key? — 
I ’ll wind you up.” And she could hardly 
convince him that there was n’t a key and 
that she did n’t need winding up. 

By and by they came to a log hut. 
Smoke was coming from the chimney, a 
bright light shone through the window, and 
a most delicious smell filled the air ; so they 
decided to take a nice long rest. Jack-in- 
the-Box knocked at the door. It swung 
open and a huge Man with a Bushy Beard 
stepped across the threshold. He looked 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 65 


like a very rough man and Maida felt a 
little afraid of him, but he paid no attention 
to her ; he only stood stock still and stared 
at Jack -in -the -Box. Then he saw the 
Candy Kid and his eyes nearly popped out 
of his head. Maida saw he was afraid of 
Jack and the Candy Kid, — (for really they 
were unusual, you know, and enough to 
frighten a man, no matter how rough he 
was, and how bushy his beard) — so she de- 
cided to reassure him. “Fido,** she whis- 
pered, — (they all called the Bear “Fido” 
because he was so “ cute ”) — “ Fido, you ask 
him to let us in.” So the Bear advanced 
bowing politely and in his own language 
spoke as nicely as he could. That is, he 
started to speak. For no sooner did the 
Man with the Bushy Beard see Fido than 
he jumped back into the hut. Still bowing 
politely Fido followed him. 

Then for a little while there was a great 


66 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


commotion in the hut. “Oh, they’ll hurt 
Fido,” screamed Maida in dismay, but 
before she could go to his aid, the door 
swung open again and the Man with the 
Bushy Beard popped out, followed by some 
more Men with Bushy Beards, and they all 
ran away as fast as they could. 

“There must be something in there that 
frightened them,” whispered Jack, cowering 
close to the Candy Kid. “I wonder what 
it could have been,” was the Candy Kid’s 
reply. But when they finally plucked up 
courage and stole into the hut, there was 
nothing at all inside to alarm anybody — 
and dear gentle Fido sat calmly beside the 
fire warming his feet. They looked all 
through the hut, in every nook and cranny, 
but whatever had frightened the Men with 
the Bushy Beards was gone. 

After awhile the Bear curled up in a 
corner and went to sleep (and really for 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 67 


such a nice Bear he snored dreadfully), 
while Maida began to explore the hut to 
see if she could find something for supper. 
Strange to say she felt a longing for a bowl 
of wheat and cream such as they always 
made her eat at home for breakfast. Her 
search was interrupted by the sound of loud 
and angry voices, and when she ran to the 
other end of the hut she was surprised to 
find the Candy Kid and Jack-in-the-Box 
having a most awful quarrel — and what was 
worse, it was a quarrel over some lady they 
both knew though she could n’t tell who it 
was. Jack-in- the-Box was so angry all his 
machinery clicked and rattled, and all the 
sugar had been left out of the Candy Kid’s 
temper, for it was anything but sweet. 

“You overgrown alarm clock,” he sneered 
at Jack, “I tell you she liked me best.” 

“Oh, run down, run down,” snapped Jack 
angrily, “how could she prefer you? Why, 


68 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


you ’re only a lump of glucose and some 
dye.” And they went on at a terrible rate 
saying all sorts of horrid things to each 
other, but Maida could n’t find out who they 
were quarrelling about, and it made her feel 
just a teenty, weenty bit jealous to find there 
was some one besides herself they liked, and 
liked well enough to quarrel over. Finally 
the Candy Kid appealed to Maida for aid. 

“Where you come from,” he asked, 
“when two people both like somebody else 
what are they ? ” 

“ Foolish,” was Maida’s prompt reply. 

“ No, no,” persisted the Candy Kid, 
“ what do you call them ? ” 

Maida puzzled a moment and let her 
mind run over some of the romantic stories 
she had read. “I know,” she said, “they 
are called rivals.” 

“Then I ’m a rival,” said the Candy Kid 
stoutly. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 69 


“So am I,” cried Jack. “Tell me — ^what 
do rivals do?” 

Maida puzzled over this a moment. 
“Why, they take pistols or swords and 
fight a duel,” she said presently. 

“Good,” replied the Candy Kid, “we’ll 
fight a duel, although I have n’t the faintest 
idea what a duel is, or how to fight it” 
Then turning to Jack-in- the-Box he added, 
“have you a sword in your pocket?” 

“Oh, no,” Jack answered quickly. 

“Why are you so positive?” inquired the 
Candy Kid sulkily. 

“Because,” Jack retorted, “I don’t know 
what a sword is, and I have n’t any pocket” 

“ Pooh, that ’s no reason,” complained the 
Candy Kid, and they were about to resume 
their quarrel when they were interrupted by 
Fido, who had been aroused by their noise 
and sat solemnly blinking his eyes. First 
he pointed to a picture on the wall. It was 


70 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


a picture of two men fighting with long 
swords, and Fido pointed to the picture 
and then to them, and then took the poker 
from the hearth and showed them just how 
a duel with swords must be fought. And 
I may say here it ’s no use asking me how 
Fido knew all about duels — for I have n’t 
the faintest idea — all I can say is, he was a 
very clever Bear. They clearly understood 
by this time what they must do. But alas, 
they had no swords. At last Jack had a 
happy thought. He dashed out the door 
and returned with two long pointed icicles, 
nearly as hard as steel, and gave one to the 
Candy Kid. Maida was very much fright- 
ened and wanted to stop them, but they 
paid no heed to her tears. The Bear 
planted her in a chair by the fire and shook 
his paw at her, so she felt afraid to move. 
The Bear stood between Jack and the 
Candy Kid and said, “ovowoogkgk.” 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 71 


(That’s as near as I can come to spelling 
it as I have n’t quite enough letters to make 
it sound just right), and just as soon as he 
said it Jack-in-the-Box stuck his icicle right 
through the Candy Kid’s breast. Maida 
screamed with horror, but the Candy Kid 



laughed and said, “you tickle.” Then he 
ran his icicle into Jack’s breast, and Jack 
ran down. It took all three of them five 
minutes to get him properly wound again. 
Once more the rivals faced each other and 
the Bear gave the signal. But they both 


72 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


took bad aim, for instead of piercing each 
other, both of them stuck the Bear. That 
was the end of the duel. Fido was so 
vexed he broke both icicles. Then he took 
Jack and the Candy Kid over his knee and 
gave them a good spanking. After that it 
took them an hour to plug up the cavity in 
the Candy Kid’s chest with sugar, and to 
get the rust out of Jack’s cogs where the 
icicles had melted. And although poor 
Maida was very tired and sleepy she did n’t 
feel like going to bed, but sat by the fire 
revolving a question in her mind. 

“ I wonder,” she said to herself, “who it is 
they like enough to fight a duel over.” 


Chapter X 

On the edge of the Frozen Zone stands 
the City of Arcturia. You need n’t look 
for it in your geography, you won’t find it 
there ; in fact, one of the men who wrote the 
“Geography” positively declared there is n’t 
any such place. So it is n’t on the map. 
But as Maida spent several days there she 
ought to know more about it than some old 
bookworm who stayed at home and scribbled 
while she was on her travels. 

Did you ever go to bed at night when it 
was raining and raining and raining, then 
awaken in the morning to find the rain had 
frozen on the grass, and on the twigs — till 
all the trees looked as if they had been 
dipped in melted silver and then set out to 


73 


74 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


dry? Well, that’s the way Arcturia looks. 
Without doubt it is one of the most wonder- 
ful and beautiful cities in the world — all ice 
— nothing but ice. 

Maida rode on Fido’s back across the 
snow desert with the Candy Kid on one 
side and Jack-in-the-Box on the other, for 
they were rivals you know and quarrelled 
dreadfully whenever they got near each 
other. As they drew near the city their 
eyes were dazzled by the brightness — even 
Fido blinked, but they pressed on till they 
came to a sort of wall which brought them 
to a halt. It was a most peculiar wall — it 
was so high the Bear could not see over it, 
even though he reared up on his hind legs, 
when he was very tall indeed. It ran East 
as far as they could see and just as far to the 
West, and it was hard and smooth, like pol- 
ished iron. The four sat down in a row and 
stared first at each other and then at the wall. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 75 


“What do you suppose it is?” asked 
Maida, “and how are we going to get over 
it?” 

Suddenly the Candy Kid remembered. 
“I know, I know,” he laughed, “I re- 
member now. I ’ve heard Santa Claus talk 
about this. It’s the Arctic Circle.” 

“That’s right,” chuckled Jack-in-the- 
Box, and the Bear nodded his head wisely. 

“The Arctic Circle?” said Maida, “then 
we won’t have a bit of trouble. We ’ll just 
go right on ; for the Arctic Circle is only an 
imaginary line.” 

“Do you mean to tell me I don’t see it?” 
asked Jack. 

“You think you see it,” Maida replied 
severely, “but if you just ignore it, why, 
it can’t keep us back a minute.” 

“I’m going to find out,” said the Candy 
Kid, and he walked deliberately into the 
wall and disappeared. The others quickly 


76 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


followed him, and in a moment they found 
themselves on the other side, with the city 
before them, and the wall stretching out to 
the East and West, behind them. 



The first thing they came upon was a 
Walrus, who was smoking a pipe and re- 
pairing a hole in the street. You ’ve seen 
the men set in the granite blocks, or put 
down that black sticky stuff that is so nice to 
roller skate on when it is all flattened out 
and hardened? Well, the Walrus didn’t 



“He walked deliberately into the wall” 





THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 77 


use blocks of stone or black sticky stuff on 
the street, he simply set in a nice fresh block 
of ice and packed some snow in the little 
cracks. The street was all ice blocks. 

Somehow Maida did n’t feel at all afraid 
of the Walrus. He looked very kind, so 
she timidly went to him and spoke. “ Please, 

sir ” Then she shrank back a little, as 

the Walrus looked up in surprise. “I don’t 
mean please, sir, for of course you ’re not a 
sir, you ’re only an it — \>\}X please — can you 
tell us where we can go to get something to 
eat?” 

“On the corner of the next street,” the 
Walrus replied, “you will find a street car 
which passes the hotel.” 

“But we have n’t any carfare,” said 
Maida, turning to the others, “have we?” 
And the others shook their heads dolefully. 

“Oh, I’ll lend you carfare,” replied the 
Walrus, and he reached in his pocket, drew 


78 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


out a large fish, and handed it to Maida. 
“Good-bye,” he said, and began to work on 
another bad place in the road. 

When they got to the corner they looked 
about for a street car, but there was n’t 
one in sight Just then a large sledge 
drawn by four reindeers dashed up. Some- 
body rang a bell. The sledge stopped, and 
a pretty Eskimo girl got off and pattered 
away. 

“This must be the car,” said Maida, 
and she was sure of it when she saw the 
driver was a huge Penguin, and the con- 
ductor was a Seal wearing a nice uni- 
form. They climbed aboard, but the Seal 
would n’t let Fido go in the sledge and sit 
down. 

“Company rule,” he said gruffly, “Polar 
Bears must be left on the platform,” so Fido 
curled up on the back of the car. Maida 
handed the Seal Conductor the fish which 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 79 


the Walrus had loaned her. “Four?” he 
asked, and Maida nodded; so he rang the 
bell four times, and gave her the change, 
which was half a dozen sardines. 

Maida will never forget that street car 
ride, the first day in Arcturia. They passed 
through the market-place and saw ever so 
many seals trading their cast-off coats for 
sugar plums, and gobbling them up in a 
hurry as if they feared they would lose 
them. 

They passed great high buildings, made 
out of blocks of ice, and saw little Eskimo 
boys selling newspapers printed on sheets 
of ice. Maida bought one, and after she 
had read it she ate it ; and it was very good. 
At last they came to the hotel. They all 
got out and went in the office, and who 
do you think they found? Santa Claus and 
Billy and the Man with the Growly Voice. 
The big Eskimo, Kankakee, and his pretty 


8o THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


daughter, Kokomo, while over in a corner 
stood the Disconsolate Lover staring out of 
the window as if he hoped to see the White 
Lady he was seeking. 


Chapter XI 

It took them an hour to tell each other 
where they had been and what they did 
there, and where they were going and what 
they expected to do, and you may well 
believe Maida was glad to see all of them 
again. Especially Billy, for Billy was the 
very nicest boy. Maida was not very fond 
of the boys at home. They were always 
throwing snowballs, or fighting, or pulling 
the cat’s tail, or tying tin cans to the poor 
dogs. Billy was n’t a bit like that. The 
Man with the Growly Voice had been de- 
layed because he did n’t know the Arctic 
Circle was an imaginary line so he had to 
get a ladder and climb over it, but he had 
managed to preserve his can of climate 

6 8i 


82 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


through all his travels and Maida was 
delighted to learn she would have his 
company the rest of the journey. As for 
Santa Claus, he was anxious to reclaim 
Jack-in- the-Box and the Candy Kid, but 
they flatly refused to go home until they 
had finished the trip with Maida ; so Santa 
decided to take Billy and go too, which 
was very nice of him. 

“Do you know,” said Jack-in-the-Box, 
as they all sat about the hotel office plan- 
ning the journey, “there is something 
wrong with my knee.” 

“Rheumatism,” said Maida wisely. 

“Nonsense,” replied Jack, “how can one 
have rheumatism in a ball-bearing? It ’s a 
hot box.” 

“What is a hot box?” inquired the Candy 
Kid, “I never had one.” “Of course not,” 
Jack answered, “ if you had one you ’d melt.” 

“I know what a hot box is,” said Maida. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 83 


“I was on a train once and it stopped so 
we all got out to see what was the matter, 
and we found one of the axles had got dry 
and set fire to things, and it was smoking 
dreadfully.” 

“You’d better go to a doctor,” said 
Billy solicitously. 

“Doctor,” snapped Jack, “what good 
could do?” “You’d better send for a 
plumber,” advised the Candy Kid. 

“No, a plumber won’t do,” said Jack 
reflectively, “he would only say, ‘I’ll be 
around to-morrow with a piece of wire,’ and 
then put in a bill for more than I ’m worth. 
I am not sure when I’m to be repaired, 
whether I go to the jeweler, or the black- 
smith.” 

Santa Claus put an end to the discus- 
sion, by thinking a new knee for Jack, 
and as soon as he thought it, why there it 
was and Jack was as spry as ever. 


84 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


Maida wandered about the hotel marvel- 
ling at the wonder and beauty of it All 
the bell-boys were Albatrosses and they 
dusted the chairs with their wings, and 
carried satchels in their bills. The elevator 
boy was a dear little White Fox, and he 
invited Maida to take a ride with him. So 
she did, and got off at the thirty-ninth story. 

“I would take you higher,” barked the 
Fox, “ but the sun is very hot to-day, and 
the fortieth-story has just melted.” 

So she stepped out of the elevator 
and walked about till she came to a lovely 
big room, with frost letters on the door, 
which read, “Ladies’ Reception Room.” 
It was the most gorgeous room she had 
ever seen. The pillars were made of solid 
green ice, the roof was all icicles and 
stalactites, and the walls were covered with 
lovely frost pictures, just the kind you see 
on the window on a cold day — and they 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 85 


changed every now and then. While Maida 
was admiring the room she became aware 
that someone was standing at a window 
gazing out over the city, and looking closer 
she found it was the most beautiful lady she 
had ever seen. Her face and hands were 
snow white, her long robe was white and 
frosty. She wore a star on her forehead 
and her face was very sad. For some rea- 
son Maida felt very sorry for this lady, so 
she went to her and touched her on the 
arms. Did you ever put your hand on an 
awfully, awfully cold piece of ice on a win- 
ter’s day? Remember how it was so cold 
it almost burned? Well, that’s the way 
Maida felt when she touched the lady. 

“My! but you ’re cold!” said Maida, “I 
think you Ve got a chill.” 

The lady smiled sadly, and looked at her, 
so Maida smiled back, but she kept at a 
little distance. 


86 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


“Who are you ?” asked Maida, “and why 
do you smile so sadly? And why are you 
so cold?” 

“ I am Stalacta, an ice maiden, one of the 
Vestals of the Queen Aurora Borealis.” She 
sighed, and everything the lady said sounded 
exactly like the most beautiful poetry. 
“And with my companions I had sworn 
never to leave the Queen, but to serve her 
always. But one night I had a dream — ah, 
a most glorious vision. I seemed to float 
away on the bosom of a cloud, to a far land 
where all was light and warm and beautiful 
— and there I saw one whom I can never 
forget — nay, I would not forget him if I 
could. He was tall and straight and 
strong, his face was kind and his eyes were 
true; and as he looked at me my heart 
seemed to burst its icy bands, and I knew 
that I could never serve the Queen again, 
but could only be happy — with him. I 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 87 


beckoned, he drew near. I held out my 
arms, and then — I awoke. Night after 
night I dream of him — night after night I 
see him holding out his arms ; he is draw- 
ing nearer, always nearer, and I will never 
rest till he finds me.” 

“Ah, ah, ah, come with me quick!” cried 
Maida. So she put on her mittens and 
took the Ice Lady by the hand, rushed her 
down the elevator, and hurried her across 
the hotel office to where the Disconsolate 
Lover was still standing, looking out the 
window. 

“Here he is,” she cried to the Ice Lady; 
then to the Disconsolate Lover, “ Here is 
your dream — the White Lady.” 

The Disconsolate Lover turned, and he 
and the White Lady stared a moment at 
each other. Then what did he do, right be- 
fore everybody in the hotel office, but take the 
White Lady in his arms. But not for long ; 


88 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


you see he didn’t realize how awfully cold 
the White Lady was, while she did n’t real- 
ize how very warm he was, being from the 
South. So if he hadn’t let her go — she’d 
have melted. And the two poor creatures 
who thought so much of each other were 
kept apart. The Disconsolate Lover 
could n’t kiss the White Lady’s hand. 

“Oh, what shall we do?” sighed the 
White Lady. “I think so much of you — 
I do indeed; but you are fatal to me. If 
you come any nearer I’m sure I shall 
melt.” 

“You freeze me through and through,” 
he answered ; “but I don’t care for that — for 
you really are the most beautiful lady in the 
world.” 

Then Maida had an inspiration, and she 
jumped up and down, clapping her hands 
with Joy, for she had found a way to get 
them out of their troubles. “Come with 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 89 


us to the Wishing Post,” she cried, “ and 
you can wish, each to be like the other.” 

Everybody clapped their hands at this, 
and said it was a fine idea, so the Disconso- 
late Lover and the White Lady agreed to go 
along with them. 


Chapter XII 

‘‘ Now who ’s going to show us the way 
across the Forbidden Land to the City of 
Illusia where the North Pole is?” asked 
Maida. 

“Fido, of course,” the Candy Kid and 
Jack-in-the-Box replied together; so the 
three hurried off to find Fido. They dis- 
covered him drinking pink lemonade through 
a straw, lazily keeping cool with a palm leaf 
fan, and quickly explained what they wanted 
him to do. Greatly to their regret, as well 
as to his own, Fido could be of no assist- 
ance, as he had never been any further 
North than Arcturia. He was willing to 
go along with them, but he could n’t lead 
the way. And although Maida and the 


90 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 91 


Candy Kid and Jack-in-the-Box, as well as 
Billy and Santa, and the Man with the 
Growly Voice, looked about everywhere, 
they could n’t find anyone to guide them to 
the City of Illusia. So they put an adver- 
tisement in the evening paper and waited. 
Very soon the big Chief Kankakee followed 
by pretty little Kokomo and a number of 
Eskimos filed into the office of the hotel. 
The Eskimos all sat down in a circle while 
Kankakee stood in the centre and made a 
fine speech. As nearly as we (Maida and 
I) can remember, the speech ran something 
like this : 

“I am Kankakee, chief of this tribe and a 
person of great dignity and importance. 
These, my vassals, will serve me to the 
death and go wheresoever I bid them. 
Have I not spoken truly, Oshkosh ? ” 
(Whereupon Oshkosh rose and made a 
low bow.) 


92 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


“And of all the men in Arcturia I alone 
know the secret way across the Forbidden 
Land, and I alone can guide you to the City 
of Illusia. Answer, Keokuk, have I not 
said the truth?” 

Keokuk rose. “You have indeed,” he 
answered humbly. 

“ Now, seeing that I am a person of such 
importance, it is well that my service should 
receive a great reward. Therefore I will 
guide you across the Forbidden Land to 
the City of Illusia but you must pay the 
price I ask.” 

Then Po-Dunk and Cai-Ro and Chi-Ca-Go 
and all the other Eskimos solemnly nodded 
their heads and echoed “pay the price.” 

“What price do you ask?” inquired the 
Man with the Growly Voice. 

‘T ask neither candles nor spear-heads,” 
replied Kankakee, “nor fish-hooks, nor 
blubber.” 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 93 

“I’m glad of that,” said the Man with the 
Growly Voice, “for I ’m all out of blubber, 
and my last spear-head is gone.” All the 
same he felt very uneasy, for an Eskimo 
prizes spear-heads and fish-hooks very 
highly, and dearly loves blubber; while can- 
dles are just the same as lemon drops in 
Eskimo land. So he knew Kankakee meant 
to ask for something very, very precious. 

“Well, I must go to the North Pole,” 
he continued, “ and if I can, I will pay your 
price, so name it.” 

Kankakee proudly tossed his head and 
went on with his speech. 

“ My daughter Kokomo is the child of a 
chief and it is fitting that she should know 
all things. She should be taught by a 
great wizard like you. ” (You see Kankakee 
thought the Man with the Growly Voice 
was a wizard because he had bottled up the 
Tropical Climate.) “Take my daughter. 


94 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


therefore, into your tribe and teach her your 
magic, and I will guide you — refuse, and 
you will never find the way.” 

Then Kalam-Azoo and Wis-Consin and 
Neva-Da all nodded their heads and re- 
peated, “Never find the way.” 

Well, of course, Maida was delighted, 
for she knew Kokomo liked her, and 
wanted her for a playmate; but the Man 
with the Growly Voice was dumbfounded, 
for he had never paid any attention to Ko- 
komo or noticed her ; in fact, he did not 
know she was Kankakee’s daughter. So 
he turned to Kankakee and said, “How old 
is your daughter?” 

“She has seen fourteen days, and four- 
teen nights,” replied Kankakee with dignity. 

“Fourteen days and fourteen nights,” 
echoed the Man with the Growly Voice, 
in amazement. “My goodness — ^you don’t 
want a teacher for her, you want a nurse. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 95 


I don’t mind adopting a little girl or so, 
but I certainly object to search for the North 
Pole wheeling a baby in a perambulator.” 

Maida laughed and pushed Kokomo out 
from behind her father. “Here ’s the baby,” 
she laughed. “Don’t you remember up 
here the days and nights are six months 
long?” 

So Kankakee agreed to risk his life and 
guide them all across the Forbidden Land, 
while the Man with the Growly Voice agreed 
to teach Kokomo all his magic and to make 
friends with her. He searched through his 
pockets, found an apple, and gave it to her. 

She examined it carefully. “ How shall 
I wear it?” she inquired. 

Maida laughed and explained — “It isn’t 
to wear, it ’s to eat'" So Kokomo took 
a bite and liked it. Then Kankakee took 
a bite and liked it, and the apple did n’t 
last very long. 


96 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


“I never saw anything like that before,” 
observed Kokomo (meaning the apple). 
“ How did it come to be?” 

“It grew on a tree,” said Maida. 

“What ’s a tree?” asked Kokomo. 

“Why a tree is — a — a tree (Now 

do you know it is rather difficult to ex- 
plain just what a tree is to a person who 
has never seen one?) “Why a tree is a 
great big post of wood that grows right out 
of the ground and there are leaves on it, 
and in the Summer apples hang from the 
branches.” 

Kokomo looked at Maida in a very 
disappointed way, then went to the Man 
with the Growly Voice. “Did you hear 
what that little maid told me?” she asked 
him and pointed to Maida. 

“Oh, yes, and it’s quite true,” he replied, 
laughing. 

Kokomo bowed humbly. “I am your 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 97 


handmaid — you are my Lord,” she 
said. “If you say the story is true and 
these things are, then it is true, and they 
are — I will believe you, if you bid me — but 
why not confess the truth, that you made 
the apple.” 

By this time all of the natives of Arc- 
turia who could crowd in the hotel office 
were gathered about listening with all 
their ears. The Man with the Growly 
Voice thought to dazzle them with stories 
of his own country. 

“In my country,” he began, “there are 
so many trees we cannot count them. In 
the Summer they are all green. The 
grass is green too — it grows like a car- 
pet underfoot. Lovely clear rivers flow 
past the cities and when the weather is 
warm there is no ice and snow and the 
young men play and swim in the water, 
like the seals.” At this, a hoarse murmur 


98 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 

burst from the crowd — and an old medicine 
man pushed his way forward. 

“You say your land is all green,” he 
shouted, — “all green.” Without waiting 
for a reply, he continued — turning to his 
comrades. “Oh, a horrible land. The 
green sun rises in the green East. The 
green seal peers through a green hole 
in the ice. Men and women, bears 
and birds, all green — oh, a horrible 
land”; and wildly shaking his head, he 
hobbled away. Another took his place and 
shook his finger wildly in his anger. 

“It is not green in that land,” he shouted. 
“ See this man is not green. But his tongue 
is crooked. He tells us of posts of wood 
that grow out of the ground. How can 
such things be ? All men know that wood 
floats in from the sea, when the ice is gone, 
and that it comes in no other way. How 
then can it grow out of the ground? He 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 99 


speaks of grass that grows like a carpet be- 
neath the feet. How can this be ? Is not the 
snow and ice too thick for anything to force 
its way through ? IVe have never seen any- 
thing like that. There is nothing of that sort 
here, and everyone knows this is the finest 
and most wonderful country in the world. 
Then the horrible tale he tells about men 
who swim in the water like seals. We know 
that to be false. It is well known that when 
water covers a man, he dies. I am an old 
man but water has never touched my skin.” 

Then all the Eskimos began to talk at 
once — and — well, you never heard anything 
like it. Maida and the Man with the 
Growly Voice tried to explain, but the 
Eskimos simply could n’t understand. Some 
took the strangers for evil magicians and 
the others thought they were telling whop- 
pers. So the first thing they knew they 
were driven in disgrace from the city. 


Chapter XIII 

The unexpected enmity of the natives of 
Arcturia was very distressing to Maida, 
while her little friend Kokomo was filled 
with fear at the prospect before her. She 
clung to the Man with the Growly Voice, 
and moaned: “When we go to your 
dreadful land where all is green, you will 
not let me turn green too, — will you ? Nor 
will you let aught befall me. Ah, I know 
you will not. I fear me lest the awful grass 
pursue me as we stroll on the green rivers 
— I tremble much lest some savage trees 
catch and kill me.’' 

“Have no fear, little snowbird,” replied 
the Man with the Growly Voice cheerfully, in 
a most reassuring manner; “you will be 

lOO 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD loi 


perfectly safe. All the grass is tame, and 
with the exercise of a little agility you can 
easily escape the attack of the most fero- 



“ How Do You Do?” in Eskimo 


cious tree.” Whereupon Kokomo was 
much comforted. 

Maida felt so sorry for Kokomo that 
she ran over to her, flung her arms about 


102 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


her neck, and kissed her. Now, of course, 
Maida meant well ; she only wanted to 
make Kokomo happy ; but it was the 
first kiss that had ever happened in Arc- 
turia. When the Eskimos wish to show 
great joy, and welcome or salute someone, 
they stand on the right foot, rub their nose 
with the left hand, and wiggle the left ear. 
So when Kankakee saw Maida kiss his 
daughter he gave a howl of anger, and in a 
moment there were half a dozen keen spears 
pointing at her bosom. And, of course, she 
screamed. 

“She was trying to steal my daughter’s 
breath,” shouted Kankakee, as Jack-in- the- 
Box and the Candy Kid tried to restrain him. 
“Tell me, oh, my daughter, are you hurt?” 

Kokomo considered for a moment, 
thought it all over, decided that she was not 
hurt at all, and ended by going to Maida 
for another kiss. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 103 


“Oh, my father,” she said, after she got 
it, “ this magic of the white maiden is really 
very nice.” 

This aroused the curiosity of Kankakee, 
who called Oshkosh and awkwardly kissed 
him; but as Oshkosh was seventy years 
old, very ugly, and extremely wrinkled, 
the result of the experiment was far from 
pleasing ; so Kankakee grunted his dis- 
approval and arranged the line of march. 
There was quite a procession when the 
caravan was complete. First came twenty 
Eskimos on snowshoes. Then ten sledges 
drawn by dog teams (on one of which 
rode Kokomo and the Man with the 
Growly Voice). These were followed by 
Fido, still bearing Maida on his back, es- 
corted by the faithful Jack and the Candy 
Kid. Santa Claus was close behind 
with his reindeer sleigh in which rode 
Billy, the White Lady, and the Disconso- 


104 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 

late Lover — ^while Kankakee came last, 
striding along behind to see that no one 
straggled. When they were all in line, 
ready to start, Kankakee warned them of 
the danger. “You are now in the Forbid- 
den Land,” he said, “and it is unlawful for 
any mortal to cross it. Keep close to- 
gether, and do not speak lest your voices 
betray you to one of the snow sprites, who 
serve the Queen Aurora Borealis. Burrow 
beneath the snow if danger threatens, and 
lie hidden till it has passed. The most 
deadly peril we will encounter is Jack 
Frost. He may not discover us — but if he 
should our fate is sealed. Mush I” 

Maida began to feel a little uneasy. It 
was n’t such a joke after all to find the 
Wishing Post. 

She must have dozed a little, for sud- 
denly she awoke with a start to find that 
everybody was standing still, looking at 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 105 


a strange being who stood in their path. 
The Eskimos were cowering in a hud- 
dle and the dogs lay on their stomachs 
with their ears flattened on their heads, 
looking very much afraid. He who op- 
posed their march was very beautiful — yet 
very terrible, and Maida was so fascinated 
she could look at nothing else. He was 
tall, oh, very tall, and rather thin. His face 
was lean and white, and his nose curved 
like the beak of an eagle. But his eyes, 
oh, those wonderful cruel eyes, they were 
light blue, and oh, so cold. When he looked 
at Maida she shivered. In his hand he 
carried a sword, not of steel, but made of 
something white that shone and glistened. 
His dress too, was all white and glittery, 
but rather thin, though he did n’t seem to 
mind the cold at all. While Maida was 
staring at him one of the dogs leaped 
toward him. He did not move, or turn his 


io6 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


head, he merely let the end of the white 
sword fall till it touched the dog and the 
poor creature fell over on its back — all stiff 
and frozen. 

Then Maida knew who it was. It could 
be no one but Jack Frost, King of the 
North Wind. Were you ever dreadfully 
frightened at a cow, or a big bug, or even a 
snake? Well, do you remember that 
sting-y, creepy feeling that went over the 
roots of your hair? Maida felt that every 
separate hair was standing out straight in a 
different direction. 

“You are mortals,” finally said Jack 
Frost, and the look on his face was anything 
but pretty. “You are mortals and you 
have dared to cross the Forbidden Land. 
What have you to say?” 

No one had anything to say. 

“You know the penalty,” he continued. 
“No mortal has braved my wrath and 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 107 

lived.” All the Eskimos knelt before him 
and began to implore mercy, but he paid no 
attention to them. 

“Now pay the price of your madness,” 
he cried, and he waved the sword of white 
once about his head. 

They heard a crack and a crash behind 
them, and turning about Maida saw a wide 
space of open water which prevented them 
from retracing their steps. They were 
afloat on a huge cake of ice. But she had 
no time to think about it, for she saw the 
white sword flash through the air again, 
and oh my, the cold was awful. Even 
poor old Fido shivered and grunted, and 
when a Polar Bear feels chilly you may 
know it is really wintry. A third time Jack 
Frost waved his white sword, then he 
laughed in a ghastly way, leaped up in the 
air, and disappeared in a shower of snow 
crystals. No sooner was he gone than the 


io8 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


wind rose and a terrible gale blew with 
great fury, urging the ice-cake along 
through the black water, just like an im- 
mense ship. 

Now, of course you know there isn’t 
much open water in the Arctic Circle, but 
the whole sea is frozen over and covered 
with an ice-floe which never melts. Well, 
the ice-cake they were on came to the end 
of the open water, tilted up, slid out on the 
ice-floe, then they began to fly along just 
as if they were in an ice-boat. The wind 
blew harder and harder, the cake slid faster 
and faster, racking and thumping and crack- 
ing and crashing, and it ’s no secret now — 
Maida wished she had never, never, never 
come, but that she was back in her own 
little pink and white bed at home. 


Chapter XIV 

It grew colder and colder. Maida cried 
out to the Man with the Growly Voice and 
begged him to use one of the little tablets 
of condensed climate. But he called back 
and told her the tablets were all gone — and 
that if he turned on the tropical climate from 
the can the ice-cake would all melt and they 
would sink to the bottom of the sea. So, of 
course, there was nothing to do but hang on 
and cuddle up to the Bear. Which she did. 

At last they could see a long range of 
hills straight ahead, and they knew they 
were nearly across the frozen seas. At 
lightning speed their ice-boat dashed toward 
the cliffs and presently there was a great 
crashing and splintering of ice. The ice- 

109 


no THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


cake beat itself to pieces on the rocks and 
the whole party found themselves scrambling 
about on a most inhospitable shore. But 
they were all there, and all safe. The 
Candy Kid chortled with glee. If you 
don’t know what chortle means get out 
your dictionary. It is n’t an Eskimo word, 
though it sounds like one — but it means 
exactly what the Candy Kid did. 

“Well, at any rate,’* he said, “we ’ve 
left old Jack Frost behind.” 

A mocking laugh answered him, and 
there stood Jack Frost as fierce, as cold, 
as dangerous as ever. Fast as they 
had flown, he had travelled faster, and 
was waiting for them. So, of course, 
they were all in the depths of despair. 
Jack Frost blew a shrill blast on a silver 
whistle and in a moment they were sur- 
rounded by a legion of his Ice-Guards, so 
escape was out of the question. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD m 


Maida looked to the Man with the Growly 
Voice as if to beg him for protection. To 
her surprise he did not seem to be in the 
least afraid; he actually winked at her, as he 
unslung his can of climate and commenced 
to fiddle with the little keys and dials on it. 
And her heart leaped with joy, for she felt 
that in some way he would get them all out 
of the trouble. 

Well, to begin with, they all came in for 
a good lecture. Jack Frost just gave it to 
Billy and Santa Claus for not staying at 
home where they belonged and making toys. 
Then he scolded the White Lady severely. 
It seemed that once upon a time he had 
asked her to leave the service of Aurora 
Borealis and come and be Queen of the 
North Wind, which she refused (and I 
don’t blame her — do you?), so when he saw 
her with the Disconsolate Lover, he was 
very, very angry. After he got through 


II2 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


with those two he turned his attention 
to Kankakee and the Eskimos, lectured 
them for guiding strangers into the For- 
bidden Land, and to make it worse he 
lectured them in Eskimo talk, so I can’t 
begin to tell you what he said — but it 
sounded dreadful — even the dogs howled 
mournfully. 

Then it was Maida’s turn; and as his eye 
lighted on her, she felt that shivery feeling 
in her hair dreadfully. When she was at 
home Maida had been scolded by mama 
and Aunt Mary, and once in a while by the 
cook when she ventured into the kitchen. 
At school she had been reprimanded once 
or twice by the Teacher — and the big 
Policeman on the corner — (his name was 
Murphy, and oh, how she wished he was by 
her side for he was n’t afraid of anything) — 
well, Murphy had talked to her severely 
when she slipped across the street in front 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 113 


of the trolley car instead of waiting for him 
to lead her over. But never, oh, never, had 
anybody given her such a scolding as she 
got from Jack Frost. I can’t begin to tell 
you all he said, so I won’t tell you any of 
it — ^but when he finished poor Maida was 
sure she was the most foolish and wicked 
little girl who ever tried to find the North 
Pole. And all the time the Man with the 
Growly Voice was tinkering with the Can 
of Climate and turning little handles and 
pressing little levers. . Maida was on pins 
and needles, for something seemed to have 
gone wrong. 

Her attention was attracted by four of the 
Ice-Guards, who dragged up a huge black 
box. Looking closer Maida saw it was a 
tank filled with water, while the front was 
made of glass, just like the aquarium where 
they keep the fish. Instinctively she clung 
to Fido, for she felt something was going to 


1 14 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


happen — and it did. Two of the Ice-Guards 
seized her, and drew her to the side of the 
tank. Oh, it was just like a nightmare. It 
seemed that nobody could move, or speak, 
or do anything to help her — something 
dreadful was going on, and she couldn’t 
cry and she couldn’t call out. She was not 
left long in suspense. Jack Frost picked 
her up, just as you would pick up a kitten, 
held her over the tank, and dropped her in 
the water. Down, down, down she sank to 
the very bottom. She looked through the 
glass and saw all her friends outside, and 
she stretched out her arms to them for help. 
Then Jack Frost waved the white sword. 
All the water in the tank instantly froze, 
the sides of the tank fell away, and there 
she was — not drowned but frozen in a solid 
cake of ice. Oh, it was deathly cold, and 
she could n’t move — and she could not get 
her breath. And then — ssssssshhhh, the 



In the Cake of Ice 



f • 




* 


0 


j 


• \ 


I 






The Explorer Turns on the Tropical Climate 


I15 


ii6 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


Man with the Growly Voice opened the can 
of climate. Well, you never saw anything 
like it. The Ice-Guards disappeared in a 
cloud of steam — the falling snow turned to 
rose leaves, then to a rain of lovely flowers. 
The ice and snow disappeared like magic, 
the ice block that imprisoned Maida simply 
vanished, and she found herself free. The 
air was full of Spring. Jack Frost gave a 
horrible yell and flew away. Fido clasped 
Maida in his paws and danced for joy. 
Everybody danced and sang, for palm trees 
and banana plants and lovely creepers and 
runners were growing all about — produced 
by the tropical climate. The Candy Kid 
smiled at Jack-in-the-Box. 

“Spring has came,” he said. 


Chapter XV 

The tropical climate did its work well. 
There wasn’t an iceberg left or a snowflake 
anywhere in sight And when the Man with 
the Growly Voice took a nice swim in the 
warm water of the Polar Sea, the admira- 
tion and enthusiasm of the Eskimos was un- 
bounded. They realized they had been told 
the truth about the Southland. Kokomo 
lost her fear of trees, helped Maida weave 
garlands of flowers, and found the grass nice 
to tumble about on. Everybody took off 
their heavy fur coats, with the exception of 
Fido; of course he could n’t take his off — 
and really the heat did distress him terribly. 
Poor fellow, he wandered about from place 
to place, seeking a cool spot. Jack-in-the- 
117 


ii8 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


Box watched his restless movements curi- 
ously, then turned to the Candy Kid. 

“Fido is a fine piece of handicraft,” he 
said. “I’ve never seen him wound, yet I 
don’t believe he ever runs down. Do you 
know, I think he’s an eight-day bear.” 

They had a lovely supper of cocoanuts 
and breadfruit, with bananas and oranges 
for dessert ; but when they prepared to re- 
sume their journey to Illusia they were 
confronted by a new difficulty, — Kankakee 
could no longer guide them. He knew the 
way across the Forbidden Land of course, 
after leaving Arcturia you go to the third 
iceberg, and turn to the left, then straight 
ahead, six hundred miles — so forth and so 
on. He knew all that, but all his land- 
marks had been swept away ; he could not 
guide them through a tropical jungle. Then 
Maida had a brilliant idea. For such a little 
girl Maida was always thinking lots and lots 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 119 


of clever things. She called Santa Claus 
who came over, took her on his knee, and 
chucked her under the chin. 

“When you go about at Christmas time,’' 
she said, “ how do you get up on the roofs ?” 

“My reindeers are marvels,” chuckled 
Santa Claus. “They can run on the snow, 
in the water, or in the air.” 

“Splendid, splendid !” shouted Maida in 
great glee. “Now I’ll tell you what to do. 
Take the Man with the Growly Voice in 
your sledge, and go back to where our fly- 
ing machine fell. It’s big enough to hold 
all of us, and we’ll be in Illusia in no time.” 

“But my flying ship is broken,” objected 
the Man with the Growly Voice. The star- 
board wing is smashed, and there is a hole 
in the taffrail.” 

“I thought of that, too,” Maida answered. 
“Santa Claus, you just imagine it’s a great 
big toy and think it mended. Then it will 


120 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


fly.” Whereupon everybody shouted for 
joy. Santa Claus sat back laughing till he 
shook like a jelly. 

“I can do better than that,” he said. 
“I’ll think it mended, then I’ll think it 
here, and we won’t have to go after it at 
all.” So he did. He stood up and put 
his hands in front of his eyes, and thought, 
oh very, very hard indeed. Then presently 
he said smiling, “It’s all right, it’s mended.” 
Then he thought and thought again (and 
let me tell you it takes a good hard think 
to make an airship fly seven hundred miles), 
and the first thing they knew the flying ship 
came sailing through the air and plumped 
down at their feet, just as good as ever. Of 
course everyone was delighted — that is, 
everyone except the Eskimos. They were 
frightened and climbed trees, crying out 
the airship was an evil spirit; and it was 
hard work to coax them down. But at last 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 121 


everybody got aboard, and the reindeers 
were hitched behind because there wasn’t 
room on the ship for them. And as every- 
body was tired and sleepy except Jack-in- 
the-Box and the Candy Kid, who could n’t 
tire, and who never slept, the two were ap- 
pointed by the Man with the Growly Voice, 
who was captain, to stand the first watch. 
They were very proud to be entrusted with 
the care of the airship. They assumed a 
knowing air, and cheerily sang the chorus 
of “Sailing, Sailing!” But the Man with 
the Growly Voice stopped them (for while 
they were cunning, they were not good 
singers — neglecting to sing the same thing 
at the same time, and absolutely refusing to 
stay on the same key). 

“Jack, you take the wheel,” he said. 

“Aye, aye, sir I” said Jack, touching his 
forelock. “Where’ll I take it?” The Man 
with the Growly Voice showed him how to 


122 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


guide the ship, and said: “Now steer N. W. 
by S. E.” 

“Oh no,” said Jack, “let’s steer CO. D. 
by O. K.,” and he twisted the wheel till the 
flying ship was waltzing in circles. It took 
some time to make him behave. Then the 
Candy Kid was given charge of the engine. 
“Be very careful not to desert your post” ; 
he was cautioned, “don’t go too high, for 
we might not get down again, and whatever 
you do, don’t swallow any of the gas, it’s 
fatal. Now I’m going below. You’ll be 
relieved at eight bells.” And the Man with 
the Growly Voice turned in. The Candy 
Kid meditated a moment, then said to Jack, 
“Now we can have our duel.” “I don’t 
see how,” Jack answered. “You ninny,” 
retorted the Candy Kid, “didn’t you hear 
him say the gas was fatal?” “Fatal? Is 
it really?” inquired Jack. “Bring me a 
handful, I ’ll try it.” Well, of course, the 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 123 


Candy Kid was disgusted. Jack was so 
silly. “Do you think gas is like cheese?’' 
he snapped. “I can’t carry it around in my 
hands.” “Oh, I see,” observed Jack, “it’s 
too heavy.” “By the way,” reflectively, 
“what is cheese?” “Cheese,’' said the 
Candy Kid, “is the mother of welsh rabbit, 
grandmother of indigestion — related to 
nightmare, on the father’s side.” “Very 
interesting,” murmured Jack, “why can’t 
we have a duel with cheese?” There was 
a silence for a moment. Jack had nothing 
more to say. The Candy Kid had lots, but 
he was too angry to say it. An idea struck 
Jack presently. “Kid,” he called. “Kid.” 
The Candy Kid angrily turned and listened. 
Jack went on. “We can’t have a duel with 
gas, without a meter. I never saw a meter, 
but I ’m told they 're terrible things. You 
run the gas through, then you look at the 
meter, and drop dead.” The Candy Kid 


124 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


pointed to a rubber tube that hung from the 
bag overhead. “We ’ll eat the gas through 
this tube,” he said. “I see,” Jack replied, 
“and who wins the duel — the one who eats 
the most?” “Oh, no,” said the Candy Kid, 
“the one wins who dies the quickest.” 
So they left the flying machine to steer her- 
self and run herself and swallowed all the 
gas they would hold. If Maida had n’t 
happened to come up on deck no one would 
ever have known what became of them, 
and there ’s no telling what would have 
happened to the flying machine, for both Jack 
and the Candy Kid were turned into little 
balloons by the gas they had swallowed, 
and they bounced about on the deck, unable 
to get a foothold — until finally a little breeze 
swept them gently off, and the last Maida 
saw of them they were floating away to lee- 
ward holding each other’s hand and singing, 
“Up in a balloon, boys, up in a balloon.” 


Chapter XVI 

Of course Maida gave the alarm and the 
whole company came tumbling up the hatch- 
way in a twinkling. The Disconsolate 
Lover manned the engine. The Man with 
the Growly Voice took the tiller and the 
airship started in pursuit of the lost chums. 
By this time the two realized their plight 
and were just as anxious to return as their 
friends were to have them back ; but they 
could do absolutely nothing to help them- 
selves. Aboard the airship they could hear 
the voice of poor Jack, off in the haze saying, 
“I shall run down, I know I shall, and then 
what will happen!” 

“Run down,” retorted the Candy Kid. 
“Why, you can’t even fall down. We ’re 
up here to stay.” 


125 


126 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


They tried to swim through the air, and 
waved their arms and kicked their legs, but 
couldn’t advance an inch; they were at the 
mercy of the breeze. Every time the flying 
ship approached them, off they would float 
in another direction — -just like — did you 
ever try to drive chickens out of a garden, 
and just when you thought you had them 
cornered, they somehow went between your 
legs, or over your head, or under your arm ? 
Well, that ’s exactly the kind of time the 
people on the airship had with the two 
chums. 

“Where do we belong anyway?” queried 
Jack as the two hung suspended over a 
huge volcano — “are we citizens of Alaska, 
or Arcturia, or Illusia?” 

“I’m inclined to think,” replied the 
Candy Kid, “that if we’re included in the 
census it will be under the head of floating 
population,’* 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 127 


No doubt they’d have been soaring about 
yet, but Maida thought of a splendid scheme. 
You will notice that whenever anything 
serious was the matter, Maida hit on the 
remedy. And in this case, it was very 
simple. Santa Claus and Billy just climbed 
on a reindeer each, and cantered off across 
the clouds, until they came to Jack and the 
Candy Kid. They picked them up and laid 
them across the necks of the reindeers and 
galloped back with them. 

“Whatever made you do it?” tearfully 
asked Maida, after she had petted both of 
them. 

“It was a duel,” said the Candy Kid 
darkly, and that was all they could get out 
of him. But it made Maida feel very badly, 
for she realized the two were fighting duels 
again over the mysterious somebody who 
was the cause of their rivalry, and she 
wondered and wondered who it was. 


128 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


Well, they pumped all the gas they could 
out of Jack and his chum, and tied flat-irons 
to their feet so that there was no danger of 
them floating away again, and the rest of the 
trip to Illusia was made without misfortune. 
Maida was asleep when they arrived at the 
City, and when she dressed and went on 
deck, she found the airship moored to a 
totem pole just outside the walls, and 
everybody gone. She searched the ship 
high and low, but there was no sign of 
her friends. She knew there was danger 
for a mortal in the City of Illusia. If she 
were found there she would be put to death; 
but she decided to take the chance, thinking 
she could escape detection in the crowds. 
So she slipped off and entered the huge 
gate. She was simply amazed at the 
beauty around her everywhere. 

Huge palaces on every hand made of 
gold and silver covered with wonderful 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 129 


pictures and arabesques. Pointed turrets 
that hung overhead roofed with polished 
copper. Tall towers of pearl and porcelain 
seemed to reach to the very skies. The 
streets were paved with marble, the fountains 
ran soda water, there were flowers every- 
where, and no signs, “Keep off the grass” 
or “Private.” But nobody was in sight. 
She strayed about through the deserted 
squares, and among the temples and shops, 
till finally she met a man hurrying as if he 
were late for supper. She stopped him. 
“Please, sir, are you an Illusion?” she 
asked. 

“I am a citizen of Illusia,” he answered, 
without stopping, “yes I ” 

Maida hurried along by his side. “Tell 
me sir,” she inquired, “what makes Illusia 
so beautiful?” 

The man smiled kindly. “ Illusia is 
beautiful,” he answered, “because it is built 


130 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


of the rose-tinted dreams of young maidens 
and the brave hopes of youth. The dreams 
and the visions of the children are not 
wasted. They are brought here — they are 
used to build our palaces and temples. 
Time can never shatter them — they can 
never be destroyed.” And so he went 
his way. Although Maida did not under- 
stand exactly, she thought what he said was 
very pretty. 

By and by she found out why the streets 
were deserted. She came to a great Plaza, 
and there was the whole population of the 
city packed in a dense crowd, evidently 
waiting for something to happen. She de- 
cided she would wait too, and she managed 
to make her way to the front of the crowd. 
No sooner had she found a nook somewhat 
sheltered, than a huge shaft of light, pure 
white and almost blinding, shot up from 
the palace which faced the Plaza. All the 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 131 


people were delighted to see the white 
light and murmured with joy. 

“What is it?” inquired Maida turning 
to the little girl next to her, “ a searchlight ? ” 

“Huh,’* replied the girl, “don’t you 
know ? That ’s the Queen, Aurora Borealis. ’ * 

Maida realized she was in deadly danger, 
but it was too late to retreat, so she simply 
waited. 

A herald came out on the steps of the 
palace and blew three blasts on a trumpet. 

“Make way for Aurora Borealis, the 
Queen of Illusia, the most beautiful creature 
in the world,” he cried. A long procession 
of young ladies, in white cling-y dresses 
came out of the palace, and every one was 
more beautiful than the one who preceded 
her. 

“My goodness, they’re pretty!” Maida 
said. “ If the Queen is any prettier, she 
must be just grand.*’ 


1.32 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


All the trumpets played, the beautiful 
girls sang, the crowd hurrahed and bowed. 

Then an ugly old woman waddled out 
of the palace door and waddled down the 
steps into the Plaza. She must have been 
eighty at least. She had a red face and 
pop eyes, her nose was like a banana, and 
three of her teeth were missing. My ! but 
she was a fright. 

“Who’s that?” inquired Maida of her 
neighbor, “the cook?” 

“The cook/*' echoed the girl. “Why, 
that ’s the Queen, Aurora Borealis.” 

Sure enough, it was ! 


Chapter XVII 

Maida stared in astonishment, but the 
ugly old woman was Queen Aurora 
Borealis beyond a doubt. On her head she 
wore a great golden crown, and as Maida 
stared at her the same blinding white light 
flashed from it straight up to the sky, and 
everybody was pleased because the Queen 
was pleased. 

Aurora stopped and smiled. I wish I 
could describe that smile, but it would take 
three painters and a photographer to do 
it justice. 

“Good-morning, my children!” she cried, 
“Who is the Queen of Beauty?” And 
altogether everybody said, “You are.” 

Aurora smiled still more. 


133 


134 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


“Who is the Pride of Illusia?” she 
asked. Again a chorus arose, “You, 
divine Queen I” 

“Yes, of course I'' smirked Aurora; 
and then looking directly at Maida, she 
added, “a little louder over there.” 

The eyes of the multitude turned toward 
the stranger and Maida realized she must 
speak. “You, divine Queen!” she qua- 
vered. 

“Don’t be so piano in your praise,” re- 
marked Aurora, “ a little enthusiasm goes 
a long way.” Then turning to her sub- 
jects, she added: “ Do you know my chil- 
dren, I envy you.” 

As if spoken by one man, a mighty 
“Why?” rose from the multitude. 

“Why?” repeated Aurora astonished, 
“because you can gaze on me. You 
can feast your eyes on my lovely face.” 
Then turning to Maida, she added fiercely, 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 135 


“ it lovely — is n’t it?” Maida managed 
to pipe out, “ Oh, very ! ” but she felt guilty 
of telling an awful whopper. 

“You can gladden your eyes with my 
sylph-like form,” and again turning to 
Maida, continued, “If I’m not mistaken, 
it is sylph-like?” 

“If you please,” murmured Maida, “I 
don’t know what a sylph is, I never saw 
one, but I am sure they couldn’t look any 
worse.” 

Luckily for Maida, the Queen did not 
hear the last part of her speech. A minion 
approached Aurora, and distracted her at- 
tention by presenting her with a paper which 
bore a huge red seal. 

“What’s this?” she inquired petulantly, 
“did n’t you hear me? I was talking about 
myself. Every time I get absorbed in an 
interesting topic you come along and spoil 
it. What ’s the matter? ” 


136 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


“Your noble Majesty,” humbly replied 
the minion, “Santa Claus, the toy-maker, 
has deserted his post. We caught him 
here, together with two of his creatures.” 

Aurora frowned, then the entire assem- 
bly fell on their knees and hid their faces. 
From the golden crown a huge shaft of 
fierce red light shot up to the sky, turning 
the Plaza to crimson. 

Then other minions brought on poor 
Santa Claus with his arms tied behind him, 
and Jack-in-the-Box and the Candy Kid 
handcuffed together. Maida realized at 
once why her friends had all disappeared 
from the airship. No doubt they had all 
been captured — and she alone had been 
spared. She began to plan their escape. 
Jack-in-the-Box and the Candy Kid were 
made to stand in a line with Santa Claus, 
and were so close to Maida she could have 
touched them. The trial was very short. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 137 


Santa Claus was banished. The Candy 
Kid was to be broken up and fed to the 
kiddies in Illusia, and the key of Jack-in- 
the-Box was to be thrown away, and he was 
never to be wound up again. Forgetting 
her danger, Maida had drawn closer and 
closer to the Candy Kid, so that when 
Aurora had sentenced him, the next thing 
she saw was a strange little girl who did not 
in the least look like one of the children of 
Illusia. 

Maida thought her time had come, but a 
lucky accident saved her, as Aurora mistook 
her for some sort of a doll Santa Claus had 
made. 

“Oh, here’s another toy,” she said, 
squinting at Maida, for she was very near- 
sighted. “I didn’t notice this one at first. 
Ugly little thing, isn’t it?” 

Maida was about to protest, but a whisper 
from Santa Claus frightened her to silence. 


138 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


“Still for your life!” he said. “If she 
learns you are a mortal, you will be put to 
death.” 

So Maida stood stock still, and never 
even winked an eye. A pretty little boy, 
Aurora’s page, who carried her sceptre, 
stared at Maida critically. “I think it’s 
rather pretty,” he said. 

“Pretty?” said Aurora, “pooh, pooh! 
Why, it’s very badly made. The arms are 
much too long — the body is too slender,” 
and she gave Maida a poke in the ribs 
which made the poor child gasp for breath. 
“The color is bad and the face is — waxy. 
I could do better work than that. I ’ll have 
them break it in pieces.” Maida began to 
tremble. The little page, however, was 
persistent. 

“If you ’re going to have it broken up,” 
he said, “why not give it to me ? ” 

“Certainly,” said Aurora; and before 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 139 


Maida realized what had happened, she was 
seized, folded double, packed away in a box, 
and was being carted off somewhere, not 



Maida was Carted away in a Box 


daring to cry out for fear they would dis- 
cover she was a mortal, and put her to 
death. 


Chapter XVIII 

Of course Maida did n’t know what hap- 
pened in the Plaza after she was packed in 
the box, and carted away, but she was told 
about it afterward by Jack-in-the-Box. 
Business being disposed of, Aurora turned 
off the red light and the crowd rose with a 
sigh of relief. 

“Now that we’ve settled and done 
with all this nonsense, let’s talk of some- 
thing really worth while,” said Aurora. 
“Let’s talk about me. Unbind those two 
rogues, and let them approach,” and she 
pointed to Jack and the Candy Kid who 
were thereupon unbound and persuaded to 
draw near. Neither of them had paid par- 
ticular attention to Aurora, so when she 


140 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 141 


stood in front of Jack and smirked at him, 
all his machinery began to rattle and creak 
and whirr like mad. 

“Let me run down,” he cried, “let me 
run down, I don’t want to see any more.” 

As for the Candy Kid, he took one good 
look then covered his eyes with his hands. 
Luckily Aurora misunderstood their mean- 
ing. “My fatal beauty,” she sighed. “The 
sun is too bright for our eyes. I must be 
like that to them. Such appreciation is a 
compliment. I pardon you both. Now 
tell me,” as they started to bow themselves 
away, “ Did you ever see anything just like 
me before?” “We never did,” replied the 
two, and Aurora smirked. “For your 
sake,” she said, “ I will forgive the toy- 
maker. I had no idea he could make such 
clever marionettes. I’ll have him make 
me a couple of hundred.” Just at this 
moment there was a diversion. Fido came 


142 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


galloping through the Plaza. Not being 
accustomed to Polar Bears, although they 
have a lovely Zoo, the Illusians scattered. 

With his nose to the ground Fido was 
following the scent of his two chums and 
before anyone had a chance to prevent him 



he reared up and stood face to face with 
Aurora. She smiled on him. Did you 
ever see a fox terrier run after a cat ? Then 
just when your heart was in your mouth 
the cat got tired of running, sat down, and 
stared in the dog’s face. Do you remember 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 143 


how the dog acted ? Well, when the Bear 
came face to face with that awful smile he 
acted just like a very small pup who has 
chased a very large cat and discovered his 
mistake. Then he fled. 

“Ah, if I could only see my own face,” 
murmured Aurora. 

“If you only could!'' said Jack. 

“Why don’t you look in a mirror?” 
asked the Candy Kid. 

“ Mirror — what is that ? ” inquired Aurora. 
“I never heard of such a thing. What is a 
mirror?” 

“A mirror,” said the Candy Kid, “is a 
device that always attracts the attention of 
the ladies. You can see your face in it.” 

“If I had one could I see my face?” 
asked Aurora eagerly. “You could,” an- 
swered the Candy Kid. 

“I want a mirror!” shouted Aurora. “I 
want a mirror. If I don’t get a mirror, I ’ll 


144 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


turn on the red light and I ’ll never turn it 
off. I’ll chop off everybody’s head if I 
don’t get a mirror.” 

The Candy Kid leaned over and whispered 
in her ear. “Santa Claus always carries one 
in his coat pocket so he can see to rub the 
smut off his face when he climbs out of the 
chimneys.” 

Aurora dashed over to Santa Claus. 

“Aren’t you ashamed,” she shouted. 
“Here I’ve been asking for a mirror and 
you wouldn’t lend me yours. I’ve a no- 
tion to— there, never mind — let me have it. 
You don’t need to see your face, you know, 
for you’re ugly and old, while I — ” and 
she snatched the mirror from him. “ Now 
everybody stand back, please,” she gurgled, 
“and give me room. I’m going to see my 
face for the first time.” 

The crowd watched with bated breath, 
while Jack and the Kid sniggered. Aurora 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 145 

took the mirror proudly, held it up before 
her, and gazed into it. 



“There’s some mistake about this 
mirror,” she cried. “Some ugly old woman 


146 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 

has looked in it and her face has stuck in 
there. She won’t get out.” Then to 
her reflection in the mirror, she shouted, 
“Get out of there, you ugly thing — get 
out I ” 

But of course as long as she stared at the 
mirror her reflection stared back at her. 

“Who do you suppose that is?” she 
asked the Candy Kid. 

“Why, that's you” he replied. 

“Do I look like that?” she screamed. 

“Worse,” answered Jack-in-the-Box, 
briefly. A flash of red light burst from the 
golden crown, and the crowd fled in terror. 
Then the light changed to blue, to green, 
and all the colors of the rainbow, every 
color trying to get out of the top of the 
crown at once. “Oh, see the pretty fire- 
works,” said Jack-in-the-Box, pointing to 
the lights. 

Finally, overcome by grief and rage. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 147 


Aurora swooned, and tumbled over on the 
marble paving. 

“My goodness!” said the Candy Kid, 
“she ’s going to melt.” 

“ Not a bit of it,” said Jack-in-the-Box, 
“she’s run down. There’s something 
wrong with her works.” 


Chapter XIX 

You can readily understand Mai da was 
not at all comfortable in that box. It was 
very dark inside and very stuffy and hot. 
The box jolted and swayed till it nearly 
made her seasick ; and to add to her woe 
she had n’t the faintest idea what would be- 
come of her, for she knew that sooner or 
later they would discover she was a little 
girl and not a toy. 

After what seemed ages and ages, though 
no doubt it was only an hour or so, the box 
ceased tipping and tilting, and came to a 
stop. Dimly through the wooden sides of 
her prison she heard voices, and realized 
she was the subject of a conversation. 
“What have you in the box?’’ said one 
voice. The most wonderful toy you ever 

148 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 149 


saw,’* was the reply, and she recognized 
the tones of her captor. 

“Toy? — Huh!” sneered the first speaker. 
“What kind of a toy?” 

“A marvellous doll,” answered the other. 
Then there were shouts of laughter and de- 
rision, and it seemed that all the acquaint- 
ances and companions of the little Page were 
teasing him, calling him “Girl Baby,” and 
asking him why he did n’t wear dresses ; in 
short, behaving just as boys would behave 
at home if they saw a schoolmate with a doll. 
But their mirth died away and the teasing 
ceased when the Page opened the box, 
threw the lid back — and pulled Maida to 
her feet. 

My, how cramped and stiff she was! 
Both arms and legs were asleep, and she 
wavered, so she could hardly stand up- 
right, which of course made her look more 
than ever like a marionette. 


150 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


“ That is n’t a doll,” finally said one of 
the boys. 

“Oh yes,” replied the Page, “it is a 
marionette made by the toy maker who 
lives across the Forbidden Land.” 

Maida forgot her danger in her em- 
barrassment and snapped out, “I’m not.” 

“Why, she can speak,” said the boy in 
great surprise. 

“Oh yes,” replied the Page, coolly, “and 
she can run too.” 

“I wish I had a chance,” thought Maida, 
slying peering about for a possible avenue 
of escape ; but there was none, for all the 
boys were crowded about admiring her. 

“Can she laugh?” asked one, and without 
waiting for an answer, he tickled Maida in 
the ribs. Well you knowhow it is yourself 
when somebody holds you with one hand so 
you can’t get away, and points the forefinger 
of the other hand at you and it comes closer 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 151 


and closer, till finally — why of course you 
just can’t help laughing. At any rate, Maida 
could n’t; serious as was her plight, she 
burst into a scream of laughter (for she was 
an awfully ticklish little girl), which filled all 
the boys with delight. The one who had 
tickled her was so elated with his success 
he tried a new trick. 

“She can weep, too, mayhap,” he said, 
and pinched her. Oh, a real hard pinch — 
right on the arm! There was no doubt 
about it, Maida could weep — and did. 

“You cruel thing,” she screamed, and 
burst into tears, at which the boys only 
laughed the more. 

“She’s not a toy, she’s alive,” said the 
cruel boy staring at her. 

“Oh, no,” said the Page, “if it were 
alive it would be put to death, for it’s a 
stranger. It’s a toy.” 

“What’ll you take for it?” cried one — 


1 52 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 

and in a moment all the boys were chaffering 
with the Page, offering him their most pre- 
cious possessions, and trying to bargain for 
Maida. But the Page refused to sell. 

“I’m going to take it home,” he said, 
“and take it to pieces. You see, when I saw 

the arms and legs off ” Maida could bear 

no more. She leaped out of the box, over- 
turned two of the boys, pushed the Page aside, 
and was off, running like the wind. She 
did n’t know where, she did n’t care much, 
and she was out of sight around the corner 
before the Page and his friends picked them- 
selves up and recovered from their astonish- 
ment. Then, of course, they followed her. 
How she ran ! It seemed as though fright 
lent her speed. But the boys were all older 
and larger, so very soon she heard their foot- 
steps close behind and realized they were 
gaining on her. She had reached another 
one of those large squares or parks, sur- 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 153 


rounded with palaces, but she could see no 
way out of it except the way she had just 
come. In the middle of the park defended 
by a railing was a tall thin tower, or rather a 
huge mast, built ofsomething that looked like 
mother-of-pearl all shiny and shimmery. It 
occurred to her that if she hid behind this 
her pursuers might pass her by, so she rushed 
toward it. Alas, there was no hope — the 
Page running faster than his friends was 
almost near enough to touch her. Tired 
and dizzy as she reached the great mast she 
stumbled and clutched it for support. 

“ I wish you boys would go away and let 
me alone,” she screamed. 

Then a most marvelous thing happened. 
Instantly the Page and all his friends stopped, 
turned their backs, and walked away without 
a word. Maida was simply dumbfounded. 
What had saved her? She looked about, 
looked at the vacant square, looked behind 


154 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


her at the palaces, looked at the mother of 
pearl mast which towered overhead. Then 
she knew. At last, at last she had found 
the Wishing Post, and her very first wish 
had been granted I 


chapter XX 

Was n’t it splendid ! Her very first 
wish came true. Well, thank goodness, it 
would n’t be long until she was a young 
lady — still there was no hurry. She was n’t 
sure just what kind of a young lady she 
wanted to be. Besides she must make a 
list of things she meant to wish for, so as 
not to forget any of them. There was no 
safer place for her anywhere in Illusia, for if 
anybody tried to capture her, she need only 
put out her hand, touch the Wishing Post 
and wish them away. All her fear left her 
and she cuddled down in a heap and began 
writing her list with a stubby pencil on a 
little scrap of paper she found in her pocket. 
Suddenly her attention was attracted by 


155 


156 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 

a pitiful sight at the other end of the 
square. 

A young boy was leading a poor old man 
who hobbled painfully along, leaning on a 
cane. Both were dressed in rags and tatters, 
and the old man, whose beard and hair were 
white, wore a green bandage over his eyes 
which hid half his face, so Maida guessed 
he was blind. She felt very sorry, and 
watched them to see what they meant to do, 
but felt afraid to go to them, on account 
of the boy ; — her last experience with boys 
had been so unpleasant. At some little 
distance the old man staggered and then 
sat down on a bench at the border of the 
roadway. 

“ Oh I am so tired, so tired,” he moaned. 
“Where are we, my lad?” 

“I don’t know,” she heard the boy an- 
swer, “this is the first time I was ever in 
Illusia.” And there was something about 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 157 


the boy’s voice that sounded very familiar to 
Maida. It reminded her of — who did it re- 
mind her of? The old man bent his head 
sadly. “If I only had my eyes,” he said. 
The boy patted him on the shoulder and 
answered cheerfully — “Oh you’ll have 
them soon, and then all will be well.” 

Maida tried to remember where she had 
heard his voice. Then a dreadful thing 
occurred. Two big Illusian policemen — 
and they are much bigger and fiercer than 
the kind we have down here — ran into the 
square, seized the boy, and despite his cries 
and entreaties dragged him away, leaving 
the poor old blind man helpless and alone. 
As soon as they were out of sight Maida 
ran to the old man who was calling out 
piteously, and soothed him. 

“What can I do to help you?” she 
asked him. 

“ Nothing, nothing at all,” he answered 


158 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


sorrowfully. “You see I am blind, little 
girl, I am blind. Because my mirror 
showed the Queen Aurora how ugly she 
was, I was forced to look upon the purple 
light that shone from her golden crown. 
So now I cannot see. I shall never see 
again. And they have taken away my boy. 
I am all alone, all alone!” 

“No, not alone,” replied Maida, “I 
will guide you. It seems to me I have 
heard your voice, as well as your boy’s. 
Lift the bandage and let me see your 
face.” 

The old man pushed back the bandage 
and you can imagine Maida’s surprise 
when she saw it was Santa Claus! She 
threw her arms about him and tolcf him 
who she was. You may just believe he was 
glad to find her. 

“And now,” she said joyously, “I’ve a 
great surprise for you. You shall have 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 159 


your eyes back. No, don’t ask me to tell 
you how, but you shall see again — and very 
soon.” So she guided his faltering steps 
across the square to the Wishing Post. She 
touched it and wished Santa Claus to have 
his eyes again. Then she turned and asked 
him, “ Can you see ? ” 

“ Not yet,” he answered, so she tried it 
again. The second wish failed just as the 
first. Maida was dismayed. 

“Something is the matter,” she cried. 
“I’ve wished and wished but it does n’t 
come true. What shall we do ?” 

Santa Claus tottered toward her. “Are n’t 
you ashamed to play tricks on a poor old 
blind man — one who loved you so?” he 
asked. Of course that made poor Maida 
feel worse than ever. 

“ I was n’t playing tricks,” she sobbed, 
“ indeed — indeed I wasn’t. But it doesn’t 
seem to work, though I tried my best. 


i6o THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


Can’t — can’t you ‘think’ yourself a new 
pair of eyes?” 

“I can only think toys,” replied Santa 
Claus in a hopeless tone, turning away. He 
stumbled a wee bit and reached out his 
hand to save himself from falling. As he 
did so he touched the Wishing Post. “I 
wish they could n’t arrest Billy,” he said. 
Now, he did n’t realize he was touching the 
Wishing Post, but, of course, the Post did n’t 
know that, and it went to work to give him 
his wish. The gates of the prison flew open, 
there was a noise like breaking chains and 
rending bars, then Billy came out of the 
jail as if he were propelled by some invisible 
force. A half dozen policemen followed 
him, but every time they touched him they 
turned somersaults or flew up in the air and 
fell about, till finally they grew frightened, 
ran inside the jail, and locked the doors, 
teaving Billy standing staring about amazed. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD i6i 


But he soon saw Santa Claus and Maida 
and started over to them. 

“ Oh Billy — Billy boy,” cried Maida, as 
he drew near, “come quick, quick.” So 



Billy ran. Maida rattled on almost breath- 
less, with mingled hope and fear — “I tried 
to wish his eyes back and I can’t. You try.” 
So Billy tried, and in a moment Santa Claus 


i 62 the top O’ THE WORLD 


had his eyes back and could see as well as 
ever. How he did hug Maida and then 
Billy, and what a happy trio they were. 

“And now,” said Maida, “that the 
Wishing Post is at work again, I’m going 
to be a young lady.” So she made her 
wish. “Has it happened?” she inquired. 

“No,” said Billy. 

“That’s funny,” she observed, “my first 
wish came true in a jiffy.” 

“Have you had one?” asked Billy. 
She told him “yes.’* 

“Too bad,” he replied, “you can’t have 
another for a long time. The law is, only 
one within a year.” 


Chapter XXI 

Think of it, Maida could n’t have another 
wish for a year! “Do you mean to say,” 
she asked Billy, “ that I will have to stay 
here in Illusia and be a little girl until next 
New Year’s Day?” 

“I’m afraid you will,” replied Billy. 
And, of course, Maida was deeply disap- 
pointed. All her fears revived because she 
realized she no longer had a protector in the 
Wishing Post. There was nothing to save 
her from her enemies in case they attacked 
her. 

“I don’t think it’s safe here,” she said 
to Billy, “we have all lost our wishes, and 
the best thing we can do is to try to get 
back to the flying ship and have the Man 

163 


i 64 the top O’ THE WORLD 


with the Growly Voice take us away.” So 
they all started to make their way through 
the city of Illusia to the flying ship. 

By this time the people had left the Plaza 
and were going home to dinner, or to supper, 
or to work, or wherever people go when a 
big crowd breaks up ; and the streets were 
full of them. The three were jostled and 
pushed, as people always are in a narrow 
street when it is crowded. And before she 
realized what had happened, Maida was 
separated from Santa Claus and Billy, and 
swept away in an eddy of the crowd. 

She called and called, but no one an- 
swered. She was afraid to ask any of the 
Illusians where she was or how to get 
anywhere else because they would know 
she was a stranger; then she would be 
captured and turned over to the Queen ; 
so she simply wandered about. But oh ! 
she was so tired, and so drowsy ; so when 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 165 


she came to a pretty park where there were 
some nice long benches and the trees cast 
a deep shadow, she decided to take a nap. 
She stretched out on the bench and closed 
her eyes. 

The first thing she knew she felt someone 
tapping her on the soles of the feet with a 
stick. Did you ever see a policeman wake 
up a tramp who had gone to sleep on a park 
bench when he should n’t by rapping him on 
the soles of the feet with his club? Well, 
that’s exactly what this Illusian policeman 
did to Maida. 

“Come, little girl,” said the policeman, 
“wake up!” Maida sat up drowsily, rub- 
bing her eyes. 

“What’s the matter?” she asked. 

The policeman grinned knowingly. 
“Now, you know very well,” he replied, 
“that children in Illusia are not allowed to 
go to sleep till midnight.” 


i66 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


Maida rubbed her eyes sleepily, and rose 
to her feet. She said to herself, “I used 
to complain at home when they made me 
go to bed at dark. Oh, dear 1 if I could 
only go to sleep.” She ran after the police- 
man, who by this time was walking on, and 
said to him, “If you please, sir, how long is 
it till midnight?” 

The policeman looked at her astonished. 
“You must be a very ignorant little girl,” 
he said. “This is New Year’s Eve, which 
comes on the Fourth of July here in Illusia, 
and it won’t be midnight till half-past 
December.” So he strolled away. 

“Only July!” said Maida, “And I can’t 
go to sleep till December!” She thought 
with regret of that little pink and white bed 
at home, of the soft mattress, the downy 
pillows, and the coverlet she used to pull up 
about her chin when she nestled down to 
rest. Well, there was no use thinking of 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 167 


something she could n’t have, so she com- 
menced to walk about again. Then she 
realized she was hungry, oh, very hungry ! 
She passed a shop, over the door of which 
was a sign reading, “ All kinds of fancy 
groceries.” So she went in and asked the 
man if she could buy something to eat. 

“Certainly,” said the shop-keeper, bow- 
ing politely, “we have splendid charlotte 
russe.” 

“Oh, no, nothing sweet,” said Maida. 
At this moment the shop-keeper’s clerk 
approached her, saying: 

“Won’t you try a piece of this fine 
candy?” 

“No, I don’t want candy,” answered 
Maida. 

“Ah, I know,” said the shopkeeper, smil- 
ing, “I know what you want. We have 
some delicious ice-cream, just in.” 

“No, no, no!” cried Maida, “I don’t 


i68 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


want candy, charlotte russe, or ice-cream ; I 
want some bread and butter and oatmeal.” 
But the shopkeeper and his clerk stared at 
each other dumbfounded. Maida looked 
first at one, then the other, and asked: 
“ Haven’t you anything good to eat here?” 

The shopkeeper replied in astonishment : 
“Why, certainly, everything a child can 
desire — chocolates, and marshmallows, and 
gum-drops ’ ’ 

Maida interrupted him — “And no fried 
chicken or corn bread?” she asked. The 
clerk replied: “Now what strange things 
are these? Certainly not!” So he and the 
shop-keeper walked away in high dudgeon, 
and she went out of the shop disappointed. 

Who should she meet on the pavement 
but the Candy Kid and Jack-in-the-Box. 
They were as glad to find her as she was 
to meet them, and it took them all a long 
time to relate their experiences. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 169 


“Have you had a wish?” finally asked 
Maida. 

“No,” replied the Candy Kid, “what do 
we want a wish for?” 

“Will you give me yours ?” asked Maida. 

“Of course,” the Candy Kid answered, as 
he began to feel in his pockets to see if he 
could find a wish. “I must have had one,” 
he said, “because they say everyone has 
one, but I seem .to have lost it.” 

“Never mind,” said Maida, “come with 
me”; and taking each of them by the hand, 
she ran, and ran, and ran till she came again 
to the Wishing Post. She stood by it, the 
Candy Kid with his left hand resting on 
the mother-of-pearl mast, and said to him, 
“Now quick, quick, wish that I am grown 
up.” So the Candy Kid wished that Maida 
was grown up, and it happened. Just like 
that I Oh, it did n’t take a second. Before 
the wish had been made she could walk 


170 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


under the Candy Kid’s outstretched arm, 
and now she was as tall as he was ; but she 
didn’t have a hangy, traily gown, the kind 
that Aunt Mary used to wear ; she still wore 
the same little dress, which only reached to 
her knees. “Oh, deah me!” she said, and 
my 1 how different her voice sounded. 
“ What a shocking frock I have on ! ” 

Jack-in-the-Box saw that she was dis- 
turbed. He said, “oh, never mind, never 
mind,” and chucked her under the chin. 
She indignantly boxed his ears. “ How 
dare you?” she said; “why, the idea!"' 
Then she looked about in dismay. 

“Deah me!” she said again, “how very 
imprudent I Here I have come all the way 
to the North Pole, and I’ve no chaperone.” 

There ’s no doubt about it, Maida was 


GROWN UP. 


Chapter XXII 

Well, of course, her plight was rather 
an odd one. It did n’t seem so out of the 
way for a little girl to be travelling about 
with all these strange creatures, but for a 
young lady, a grown-up young lady, to find 
herself at the North Pole in company with 
a couple of eccentric toys, without proper 
clothes, and with no chaperone — come to 
think of it this was rather a peculiar con- 
dition ; so Maida walked away from her old 
friends, and sat down on the bench to think 
it over. Jack and the Candy Kid stared at 
each other in dismay. The change in 
Maida simply appalled them. 

“Why she looks different, and acts dif- 
erent, and her voice is n’t at all the same,” 


171 


172 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


said the Candy Kid. Jack-in-the-Box 
assented. 

“Yes,” he said, “there certainly is a great 
difference. I liked her lots better the way 
she was. This Wishing Post is certainly 
a very powerful piece of magic. I think 
I ’ll see what it can do for me,” and he 
stretched out his hand. But the Candy Kid 
leaped forward and pushed him away. 
“Don’t you touch it!” he said, “good 
gracious I just see what it did to Mai da.” 
So they sat down to think over what should 
be done. 

Now Kankakee and his daughter Kokomo 
and the Man with the Growly Voice had 
left the flying ship early in the morning, 
and had been wandering all around the City; 
so just after the sad transformation of Mai da 
from a dear little girl to a very pokey young 
lady they came wandering into the square. 
The Man with the Growly Voice was per- 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 173 


fectly easy in his mind, but Kankakee was 
nervous and anxious. He was afraid that 
something might happen. 

“I will take my daughter and go back to 
my people,” he said ; and taking Kokomo 
by the hand he started to walk away with 
her. “But why,” asked the Man with the 
Growly Voice, “why do you want to go 
away ?” 

“Because,” answered Kankakee, “I fear 
that something may happen.” 

“Now, don’t be afraid ; I will take care of 
you,” said the Man with the Growly Voice. 
“I won’t let these people hurt you. You 
know I ’m a wizard. Just see what my 
climate did.” 

“Yes, of course,” said Kankakee, “ I had 
forgotten that you were a wizard. If dan- 
ger threatens perhaps you will make the 
stars fall from the sky, or shake the earth, 
or dry up the sea.” 


174 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


“Why, of course I will,” replied the Man 
with the Growly Voice, “ a little thing like 
that would n’t bother me.” 

So Kankakee took heart and decided to 
stay ; and while the Man with the Growly 
Voice and Kokomo strolled about admiring 
the beauty of the palaces, he sat in Eskimo 
fashion, cross-legged on the ground, and 
crooned a Polar ditty. 

Now the Queen Aurora, having discov- 
ered that if she had ever had any beauty, it 
was lost, happened to think of the Wishing 
Post. It had never occurred to her to wish 
before. Why should she ? Queens have 
everything they want, so she had needed no 
wishes, but now she thought she would wish 
for her beauty to return ; so she came by 
stealth to the Square, accompanied only by a 
page, to make her wish, for she did not want 
her people to know what she was doing. 

The first person she met was Kankakee. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 175 


She gave him a scoldings but Kankakee 
paid no attention; he only laughed, and 
when Aurora threatened him, he only 
laughed the more. 

“Why, you can’t harm me, I am the 
friend of the great wizard,” he said pom- 
pously. “He knows all things and makes 
slaves of certain devils. If any one harms 
me, this wizard will pull down the stars, 
dry up the sea, and shake the earth. He 
told me these things himself” 

“Oh, he did, did he?” replied Aurora 
angrily. “Well, we will see about that. 
If I catch anybody fooling with my stars, or 
shaking my earth, or drying up my sea, I 
will have him arrested very quickly, I can 
promise you that. Where is this wizard 
friend of yours ?” 

Kankakee called the Man with the 
Growly Voice, who quickly came to him. 
Well, the Queen threatened them both with 


176 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


all kinds of horrible things, but Kankakee 
felt perfectly easy in his mind. 

“Protect me, my friend,” he said, “pull 
down a star or two, just to show her what 
you can do; or shake the earth. You 
need n’t shake it too much. He paused ex- 
pectantly. “Well, go on; I am waiting,’* 
he said, “why don’t you shake the earth?” 

The Man with the Growly Voice was 
disgusted. “Kankakee,” he said, “you 
talk too much.” Then there was quite a 
scene. Aurora called some of her minions, 
who looked very threatening; Kankakee 
grew angry, because he had been deceived ; 
so the Man with the Growly Voice felt 
very ill at ease. It happened that he was 
standing close to the Wishing Post. 

“My goodness I” he said, “I wish I was 
out of this!” And off he flew into the air, 
out of sight, before any one could say “Jack 
Robinson” ! 


Chapter XXIII 

Maida was grown up. There was no 
doubt about that. She could go anywhere 
she liked — she could do anything she chose 
— but it occurred to her there was n’t any 
place she wanted to go — nor anything she 
cared to do. So she yawned. 

Her sensations were most peculiar. She 
could recollect just how she felt when she 
was a little girl, — and she realized that she 
felt very different since the great change 
had taken place, — and to be perfectly 
frank, she was n’t sure that she liked the 
new feeling. Of course, one always hates 
to admit one has been wrong or made a 
mistake. Still — when one is sure of it — 
why it ’s lots better to come out plump and 


177 


178 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


confess it at once. Try it yourself next 
time and see. 

Well, it seemed to Maida as she sat there 
and tried to puzzle it out that there were 
two Maidas hidden away in her. One was 
the little girl she used to be, who always 
had such lots of fun and who enjoyed a good 
time. A little girl who liked everybody 
and whom everyone liked, but this little 
girl was hidden away down deep out of 
sight — bound some way so she could n’t 
move. The other Maida was older and 
wiser, did n’t care to have a good time 
— that is, the old kind of a good time — 
and was all stiff and starchy ; — and really 
it ’s terrible to have to feel dignified, and 
to have to do things you don’t care to do 
just because people expect them of you. 

Of course she made a mistake in not 
wishing her dress to be grown up too. 
Still, she reflected, it would n’t take long to 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 179 


set that right when once she returned home. 
Home — that was the thing — how was she 
to get home ? 

She realized with great embarrassment 
— to the new Maida — that for a grown-up 
lady to sit about under the North Pole 
with a lot of strangers was a most improper 
proceeding. Did you ever have one of 
those dreams in which you found yourself 
out on the street in a nightie and a fur cap 
— or in a ballroom in a bathing-suit ? And 
you could n’t get away, and you could n’t 
get clothes — my I it was just dreadful! — and 
you woke up blushing for shame ? — That ’s 
just the way Maida felt. 

She did n’t know where the dressmakers 
lived, and she had no chaperone nor any 
place to go and shut herself in and say 
“not at home” if anyone called. 

Finally she decided to write a letter home 
asking them to send for her — ^so she spoke 


i8o THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


to a boy who chanced to be passing — one 
of the very boys, by the way, who had 
teased the Page to sell her. 

It gave her a most unpleasant sensation 
to note that her voice sounded different, — 
oh, so different; and she also noticed that 
while she wanted to be kind and friendly 
her tone was haughty, and her attitude 
severe. 

The old Maida, the little girl, would 
have smiled and asked “Say, boy, where’s 
the post-office ? ” Then the boy would have 
grinned, and stood first on one foot, then 
on the other, and mauled his cap about, 
blushing a bit — then he ’d have told her. 

That’s the way she wanted to speak. 
That ’s what she meant to say. But this is 
what the boy heard : “ Come here, boy 1 Is 
there a post-office in this outlandish place ? 
If there is, I wish you’d tell me where to 
find it.” 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD i8i 


And she had to say it that way; she 
could n’t help herself. 

“Decidedly,” she said to herself (that is 
the little girl Maida said ’way down deep), 
“ if I had met myself grown up when I was 
a child — I would never have wished to be 
me." This may seem very obscure, but if 
you puzzle it out you’ll see it meant just 
what she thought. 

But the boy — well, he was rather naughty. 
He simply made a face at her and ran away. 
Just then Santa Claus bustled up to her with 
Billy following him. Both had recovered 
their clothes and thrown away the old rags 
— so Billy looked just as nice and Santa 
Claus just as jolly and rubicund as ever. 

“Well,” chuckled the sprightly old fel- 
low, “I see you’ve had your wish.” 

Maida wanted to be nice — but alas — the 
“little girl” was hidden down so deep she 
just had to step back and look at him 


i 82 the top O’ THE WORLD 


coldly, saying, “Excuse me, I have n’t the 
pleasure of your acquaintance.” 

How Santa Claus did stare ! 

So Billy came up to her, his friendly face 
shining with joy. “ Hello ! ’' he said. 

The child Maida was just aching to take 
his hand, and cling to him, but before it 
could happen another cold speech fell from 
her lips. 

“If you wish to converse with me,” she 
observed haughtily, “please have some one 
give you an introduction, for, of course, you 
understand no grown-up young lady can 
speak to a total stranger.” 

Think of it! To Billy, too! My good- 
ness, but he was hurt ! 

“Don’t you know Santa Claus, Maida?” 
asked the old fellow, greatly troubled. 

She looked at him coldly. “Oh, I 
know,” she said, “you’re that amusing 
old myth I met when I was a little girl, 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 183 


long ago.” (And it did seem long ago.) 

“A myth ! ” gasped Santa Claus. “ Me ? 
Don’t you believe in mef' 

“You must consider me very unsophisti- 
cated,” answered Maida. (And the big 
word did n’t bother her a bit now that she 
was a grown-up.) “You don’t exist. You 
could n’t exist. You’re a figment of the 
imagination.” 

There — it was out 1 She did n’t believe 
in Santa Claus ! Yet there he stood before 
her. Clearly one had to lose much to be 
grown up. 

Poor Billy made one more effort. “ Why, 
you and I used to be such great friends,” 
he said, smiling sadly at Maida. 

She tossed her head. “ That was long 
ago,” she answered, “when I was a little 
girl. Only fancy, I used to like you very 
much then. So stupid of me, was n’t it, 
for you ’ re only an apprentice, and, 


i 84 the top O’ THE WORLD 


of course, you don’t move in our set” 
How she hated herself, as she said 
that. 

Kokomo approached her, saying some- 
thing particularly nice in Eskimo, but 
Maida waved her aside. “I could n’t be 
seen talking to a squaw — really you know,” 
she sniffed ; then as Kokomo stepped back 
staring at her in open-eyed astonishment, 
she added, “ Horrid creatures Indians, 
aren’t they? Such a bore ” 

“Oh, little girl, hear me,” said Santa 
Claus, gravely, and his voice sounded, oh 
so serious. “Through your lost years listen 
to Santa Claus, the children’s friend. Was 
it for this you gave up your childhood?” 

The little Maida was just dancing away 
down deep inside. “I don’t know why,” 
she answered, “but there’s something in 
your voice that hurts me. You ’re making 
me cry.” Sure enough, she was crying, and 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 185 


every tear was washing away a grain of the 
grown-up Maida. 

Then the little girl Maida triumphed and 
bubbled over. “Save me! Save me!” 
she screamed ; “I don’t want to be grown up. 
I can’t have any fun and people don’t like 
me. I’m afraid. Oh, somebody, please 
wish me a little girl.” 

It was many years before Maida was a 
grown-up lady again. 


Chapter XXIV 

It was Jack-in-the-Box who did it — her 
chum and playmate, Jack-in-the-Box, who 
had seen the wonderful change with great 
sorrow, and who first heard her cry for her 
childhood. With one bound he reached the 
Wishing Post, and presto ! — she was a little 
girl again. 

Oh, how good it seemed 1 She felt so 
much at home. Her clothes just suited 
her, she knew Santa Claus, she liked Billy, 
she loved her playmate, Kokomo — oh, she 
was so happy, so happy. 

“It’s awful being grown up,” she sobbed, 
clinging to Billy. “ I ’ll want years and 
years to even get used to thinking about it.” 

“You’ll have years and years,” replied 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 187 


Santa Claus drily, and they all sat down to 
talk it over. 

None of them saw the White Lady steal 
into the Square. None of them saw her 
approach the Wishing Post and make a 
wish. But she did. “I wish,” she said 
softly — and a beautiful light shone from her 
eyes, “ I wish to be as warm as he who 
sought me from the South.” So, of course, 
she had her wish, and joined the others to 
tell them of her good fortune. 

While they were discussing this, the Dis- 
consolate Lover ran across the Square, 
and — well you can never guess the wish 
he made. “I wish,” said he — “to be as 
cold and icy as she I came North to seek.” 

So when the White Lady saw him and 
took his hand she nearly froze to death — 
for they two had simply changed places. 
They were as badly off as ever, and not 
another wish to be had during the year. 


i88 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


So the White Lady sat and wept, and the 
Disconsolate Lover comforted her as well 
as he could — from a distance. 

Now the Queen Aurora Borealis had 
been going about the Square in a fearfully 
bad temper, working the red light overtime 
and scolding her minions because the Man 
with the Growly Voice got away. But 
as she grew calmer she recollected her 
errand to the Wishing Post. She meant to 
wish for her beauty. Just as she drew near 
the Post, however, she saw Kankakee with 
his arm around little Kokomo, about to 
make a wish. 

*T shall go back to my own people,” he 
said. “I wish” — ^but Aurora was too quick 
for him. 

“I wish you not to have your wish,” she 
snapped. So, of course, he did n’t, and 
there he stood with poor little Kokomo, 
both of them looking very foolish. 


THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 189 


“Thought you ’d get away, eh?” sneered 
Aurora. “Thought you ’d escape. Well, 
I *m not done with you yet, my gay and 
festive Eskimo Chief, and I will attend to 
your case after I have recovered my beauty, 
which I will now proceed to do. I wish — 
to have all my beauty back.” 

Then she smirked at the minions and 
said, “Has it happened?” The expression 
on their faces told her it had not, and a 
glance at the mirror which she still carried 
assured her of it. 

“What’s the matter with this thing?” 
she shouted angrily pointing at the Wish- 
ing Post. 

“Only one wish during each year, your 
Majesty,” timidly replied a minion, kneel- 
ing at her feet. 

My goodness, how she raged ! — and how 
the red light played ! Suddenly her eye lit 
on Maida and a new idea came to her. 


190 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 

“That child is a witch!” she screamed. 
“She has stolen my beauty. If she does 
not return it, I’ll have her condemned to 
the Icebergs for life.” (That is just the same 
as prison for life down here. ) “ Give me back 
my angel face,” she howled ; “give me back 
my willowy form.” 

Maida shrank away in terror, and Koko- 
mo approached the Queen to try and pacify 
her. But as soon as Aurora saw Kokomo 
(and Kokomo was really pretty you know) 
she screamed, “You’ve got some of my 
beauty, tool I’ll have you fed to the 
Walrus ‘4 la Newburg.’ ” 

At this dreadful threat Kokomo began to 
whimper while the minions started to laugh 
at her distress. The more she grieved the 
louder they laughed ; and Aurora looked 
so funny and so odd, that despite their 
anxiety for Kokomo, and their fear about 
their own plight, all Maida’s friends, and 



They laughed and laughed 



1 


ix 




THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 191 


Maida, too, began to laugh at the 
Queen. 

Kokomo, meanwhile, grew very angry. 
“I wish you would all laugh and laugh 
and never stop,” she said. Then they 
could n’t stop laughing — any of them — 
because it was a wish. They just laughed 
and laughed and laughed. 

“I’ll have you all fed to the Walrus,” 
threatened Aurora between her gasps for 
breath. 

“ I shall never see my home again,” 
laughed Kankakee. 

“ I think she ’ll have us all killed,” giggled 
Billy, while the White Lady tittered, “Good- 
bye forever,” to the Disconsolate Lover. 

No matter what they said or how they 
felt — whether angry or sorry or afraid — 
they just had to laugh. 

Suddenly a great bell tolled on the top 


192 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 


of a tower nearby, and an old man appeared 
who shouted in a sing-song voice: “// is 
now the New Year. Every one is entitled 
to one wish.'' 

Maida started. The New Year! She 
could have one wish. 

Everybody was rushing toward the Wish- 
ing Post, but she was nearest, and she 
reached it first. 

“ I wish everything was just as it used to 
be and I was at home,” she cried. 


And she was! 


Appendix 

Some exceedingly cynical and incredu- 
lous people have cast doubt on the truth 
of Maida’s story. One of them actually said 
she slept and dreamed it all. The ideal 

That very day the Man with the Growly 
Voice came to see Aunt Mary, and when 
Maida met him she asked him how he got 
back. He did n’t just recollect for a 
moment, but when she reminded him, he 
remembered everything that happened while 
they were away together. 

So there now! 

Besides, Aunt Mary took Maida — not so 
long after that — to a great big house, like 
one of the Illusian palaces, where there were 
wonderful lights and a band which played 
193 


194 THE TOP O’ THE WORLD 

beautiful music ; then a big picture rolled 
up and there was the Toy Shop, and Santa 
Claus, and Billy ; yes, and Jack-in-the-Box 
and the Candy Kid, too — even the Bear — 
all of them. 

So she knows it was all true. So do you. 
Don't you? 







otr S itfOd 


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